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Horror Ball

TRACK #341:

Horror Ball by Big Eric

Oh yeah? Big Eric, huh? So, what’s this guy’s deal?

Well, let’s start with that name. “Big Eric “ appears to be a one-off pseudonym used by German artist Eric Billinghurst specifically for this track.

But Eric Billinghurst is better know throughout Germany as Bill Hurst, a standard issue AOR style rocker who produced 2 albums including the (apparently quite rare) 1982 release, Ice Cold Calculation. That fucker’s going for over 200 buck right now on Discogs. This is a shame because it contains a track called Horror that I’d love to investigate. Is it a different take on this song? Is it some other referential rock rarity? Who knows? Not us. Well, at least not yet anyway. That’s fuck off dollars from something I ain’t heard before. I’m hesitant to buy the Critters LPs that are goin for half that much, and the playlist needs a cleaner copy of that song pronto. But Ice Cold Calculation is in our sights, so we’ll keep you posted.

Until then, we can satisfy our Bill Hurst fix with Horror Ball, a peculiar Discoish tune that doubles as a fun play on words.

This one’s a bit silly, but that’s never been a problem around here, and it’s got a good groove, which is always a plus.

On top of that, it’s giving you what you need. All the Monsters you want getting shouted out to an infection disco beat.

And look at the cover to this thing! That’s just plain old fashion monster awesome.

So let’s get some horror going with Big Eric, shall we?

 

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Screaming Ball (At Dracula Hall)

TRACK #339:

Screamin’ Ball (At Dracula Hall) by The Duponts

Now, there’s a ton of this kinda old timey Monster Rock ‘N Roll, but I don’t add it to the playlist that often. It’s monstery, sure, but something about it always feels a little off, like they could be singing about any old thing. There’s nothing distinctly spooky or festive about it most of the time.

There’s even a similar tune to tonight’s inclusion titled The Mummy’s Ball by The Verdicts that I removed from this block of balls for just that reason.

But Screaming Ball has a few things going for it that help it make the cut.

First and foremost, I dig this tune. It swings.

Secondly, from what I can tell, this is the very first pop song to actually reference Dracula. At least in the title, anyway.

Thirdly, it’s a pretty referential tune. In fact, The Duponts even have a similarly structured reference to Spike Jone’s Ball-Tune, only The Duponts make The Thing from Another World do The Stroll instead of a Mole Person. But both of them do reference the Thing.

And lastly, it’s from The Duponts, whom were also know as Little Anthony and the DuPonts, after the main vocalist, Anthony Gourdine.

But The Duponts weren’t the only crew associated with a Little Anthony, as Anthony Gourdine is also the Little Anthony of Little Anthony and The Imperials fame, best known from their hits like Tears on My Pillow and I Think I’m Going Out of My Head.

In 2009, Little Anthony and his Imperials were all inducted into the Rock ‘N Roll Hall of Fame, and any time you can add a Hall of Famer to the roster, you should probably just do it.

And dammit if I don’t just love idea of a future Hall of Famer his cuttin’ his teeth on some forgotten old novelty monster record. What’s cooler than that?

Well, it’s also a Mysterioso Pizzicato offender. How do you like that? Another one for the fire, boys.

So let’s all having a scream ball over at Dracula hall. C’mon, it’s a horror party!

 

 

 

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Monster Movie Ball

TRACK #337:

Monster Movie Ball by Spike Jones

Now here’s a song that we’ve been putting off since jump.

Yep, this one’s been in the bullpen forever.

So long in fact, it was on pre-internet versions of the playlist that were played and distributed. But it’s high time to kick it on out, if only so I can stop thinking about it anymore.

I don’t imagine any playlist featuring as much novelty music as The Shindig would be complete if it didn’t feature at least one tune from The Godfather of Novelty songs himself, Mr. Spike Jones.

In the days before Rock ‘N Roll ruined everything, Spike and his City Slickers reigned supreme. He was the Weird Al of his era, though I’m not sure if that reference even holds much weight here in 2023. But he was a songsman and comedian in equal order, and having your popular tune get “spiked” was a sign you had made it big.

Though WW2 era songs about Hitler and All I Want for Christmas is My Two Front Teeth are all well and good, they’re certainly not Shindigable. However, like any novelty man worth his weight in buffalo nickels, Spike released a Horror record. 1959’s Spike Jones in Hi-Fi featured a ghastly cover with Spike as a Teenage Brain Surgeon surrounded by monsters. The album had lots of horror goings-one including a reference to Plan 9 featuring Vampira herself, Ms. Malia Nurmi. Even legendary singer and voice actor Thurl Ravenscroft, most notable for being Tony The Tiger and singing You’re a Mean One, Mr. Grinch, makes an appearance.

But for our part, it is track 6 which concerns us, a monster of a referential monster party tune, and one of the older Monster Songs on the playlist.

Spike details the gathering of Monsters big and small at his Monster Movie Ball, and as we’ve said several times around here, a full 3 years before Boris Pickett and his Cryptkickers.

But Spike’s song isn’t simply a Monster Song, featuring generic avatars of the Big 5. Nay! Monster Movie Ball, as its name suggests, is a bonafide referential hitter. In addition to name dropping all the classics, Spike finds time to reference House of Wax and The Mole People and actual creep Peter Lorre.

But he even mentions real-world singing fiends like Vampira, Zacherlee, Dave Savile’s Witch Doctor, and makes Dracula do the Cha Cha Cha à la Bruno Martino. Not too shabby.

So Spike, my apologies. Though you’ve been with us for 20 years and have been passed over, time and time again for 10, today is your day. Welcome aboard, buddy!

 

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Monster Movies

TRACK #336:

Monster Movies by Clif and Marty

Speaking of Jack and Jim, here’s another duo knockin’ out some more old time Monster Roll for ya.

Clifton Nivison and Martin Fulterman (the Clif and Marty here, respectively) were both former members of The New York Rock and Roll Ensemble. As it happens, they’re also former members of Former Members of The New York Rock Ensemble, but that’s a separate and confusing matter involving Opal Records selling a bunch of their music without Clif or Marty’s knowledge.

The Rock Ensemble were a group of Juilliard music students who decided to bust out some Rock ‘N Roll using conventional orchestral instruments. A novel concept at the time, to be sure.

After releasing 5 albums over the course of 6 years, The Rock Ensemble parted ways. Seems Clif and Marty were disillusioned with the Ensemble’s lack of commercial success, and signed with Specter Records/Opal Productions in order to make some career headway.

At Opal, Clif and Marty acted as a kind of utility duo, recording demos, writing music for other acts and releasing tunes under various pseudonyms.

And their single, Monster Movies, appears to have been just that kind of assignment.

Now, why Opal Records would assign these 2 guys some novelty Monster song in 1972 is anyone’s guess. What was the temperature on Monster Songs in ‘72? Hell, I couldn’t tell ya, cause the only other Track on Halloween Shindig from 1972 is Edgar Winter’s Frankenstein, and that’s definitely not a novelty monster song. In fact, ‘66 through ‘73 is a pretty barren wasteland for that kinda stuff, at least as far as this playlist is concerned anyway.

Now, that’s not to say the public wasn’t hungry for Monster Songs in ‘72, it just means there aren’t any that I’ve found or found and enjoyed enough to add to a 300+ rooster of songs which pretty much meet that exact specification. Just saying.

Regardless of how the 45-buying folks of 1972 felt, this is a fun and referential jam which goes so far as to specifically declare its love, not just for Godzilla, but directly to him, as though he might be out there somewhere in the South Pacific listening. Now, I gotta give that kinda thing just a little bit of love myself.

Outside of The Ensemble, and this particular single, I can’t suss out much about our boy Clifton, but Martin Fulterman is a bit of a different story.

See, Martin apparently changed his name to Mark Snow and went on to compose music for an almost absurd amount of Films, TV movies and shows. The most notable of his creations, no doubt, has got to be the famous X-Files Theme.  For real? Ole Monster Movie Marty? Pretty snazzy lineage attached to a 40 year old novelty song.

Other Mark Snow projects of note (to me anyway) include Ernest Saves Christmas, Dolly Dearest, Project ALF, Skateboard, TJ Hooker and even Pee-Wee’s Playhouse. And let me tell you, that’s cutting the list real short.

Mark Snow has composed, written songs for or worked on the music department of more shit than you’d believe. Over 350 different credits, including some ridiculous sounding TV movie called Ghosts Can’t Do It, which sounds like some PG-rated Lifetime version of Hellraiser that somehow features our 45th President himself, Mr. Donald Trump.

I’ll just leave you with that as we drop the needle on Clif and Marty’s lone 45, Monster Movies.

We love you Godzilla!

 

Audio

Midnight Monsters Hop

TRACK #334:

Midnight Monster Hop by Jack and Jim

We said we’re diggin’ deep and clearing out the bullpen in 2023, so here’s a Halloween compilation staple that’s been kicking around for longer than I can remember.

I’m glad I waited though, since last year’s Halloween Ends turned this Referential Monster dinger into a full blown Inclusive jam.

And much like Pete Antell’s It’s Halloween, Jack and Jim’s classic Midnight Monsters Hop is the best thing going for Halloween Ends and it’s literally the first minute and a half of the film.

Seriously, you can stop watching after this song ends. In fact, you could just listen to this, which features the opening dialogue with the entire tune, and probably have a more satisfying time than wading through that fan-fic grade afterthought jerk-off session they tried to pass off as the ultimate bookend to a legendary 40-year-old Horror saga. Hell, H20 is a more satisfying conclusion to the whole affair than that turd.

But I digress, cause we got this song. A bonafide Halloween jammer from 1959. Yep, you read that right. 3 years before Boris Pickett unveiled his own swinging Monster Party, Jack and Jim were laying the groundwork for monster get-togethers everywhere.

However, Bert Convy still has ‘em all beat, and no doubt provided inspiration to both, with his 1958 cut simply titled The Monsters Hop.

Credit where it’s due though, cause I think Jack and Jim here are serving up probably the swingingest tune of the bunch. It’s used to great effect in Halloween Ends too, actually tricking you into thinking you’re about to watch something cool. No such luck.

We’ve led it in, of course, with hometown hero Willy the Kid on WURG The Urge… Haddonfield’s home for rock!

You gotta love it when a horror movie gives you some solid DJ action, and Willy gets it good to The Cramp’s I Was a Teenage Werewolf. At least, I guess he gets it good. As good as that turkey is giving anyway. Unfortunately, he’s a little underutilized in the story and his death scene feels like it’s ripped from some other movie. Some movie you might rather be watching.

At least compared to the one you’ve been watching. I’m not sure the movie on display at WURG is worth watching either, but at least Michael’s not getting slapped around in a cave by some dildo who been getting bullied by a bunch of high school band dorks. A shame really, what they did to Michael.

And not just in Halloween Ends either (though perhaps the most undignified) but the whole damn lot of it, all the way down the line. From making him Laurie’s brother, to bringing him back from complete incineration, to positing him as some sort of Druid-curse vessel, to making his mask CG, to letting Busta Rhymes karate kick him out a window on a reality show, to making him some generic bullying victim with a white trash stripper mom.

It’s unfortunate that Michael couldn’t have been left to just wander off into the Halloween night, never to be seen again. Now there’s a reconned remakequel I could get behind.

Oh well, at least we got the 1st minute or so of Halloween Ends, featuring this classic monster tune from a duo who, like I so wish I could say for Michael Myers, we never heard from again.

 

 

Audio

The Night of the Monster’s Party

TRACK #333:

The Night of the Monster’s Party by The Monsters

My quest to find more and more Monstery Halloween songs for this playlist has gotten to point where I have to dig a little deeper than usual.

Anymore nowadays, the songs I’m coming across aren’t always readily available. This has lead to me hunting down and purchasing some rarer records without the benefit of hearing them first.

This has been pretty fun though. In an age where virtually any song you can imagine is easily accessible somewhere virtually, it’s added a bit of excitement back into discovering music. Waiting for a video to pop up randomly, or for someone to post a record for sale, or simply waiting for that record to arrive feels akin to something from a bygone era.

Now, that can also be frustrating too, because if a song isn’t streaming on music services, and no one has posted it on YouTube, there’s a good chance it’s also not available for sale either. So now I just got a pile of potential additions and Lord knows if I’ll ever be able to hear ‘em.

But there’s also been plenty of occasions where, despite not being digitized somewhere (or somewhere easily searchable) a physical copy is still available to purchase. As you might imagine though, this has lead to some disappointments. Such is the gamble. It’s much easier when someone has already posted whatever song it is I’m looking for to YouTube so I can easily disregard it or snatch it up at no personal time or monetary expense.

But that’s the fun.

And when it pays off, it’s definitely worth it.

And then, you write all of that, and during a cursory bit of information gathering while finalizing the post, you type the name of that song into a Google search and find out that not only was the song posted to YouTube 8 fucking years ago, but it was posted by the song’s goddamn author and singer.

Such is the case with our 2023 opener, The Night of the Monster’s Party from The Monsters.

What the fuck, YouTube? Not one time did your internal search pull this video. Not once! And across many pages. Trust me, I kept clicking.

But a simple Google search (so simple in fact I can’t believe I hadn’t done it until that moment) pulls that shit up as the first goddamn hit!? You’re owned by goddamn Google, you piece of shit.

So, rather than the line,

“It still seems wild to me that I had to purchase this 45 to be able to hear this tune.“

which I had written,

I now need to type something stupid like;

“It’s wild to me that I went through the entire process of finding this 45 for sale, purchasing it, waiting for it to arrive in the mail and throwing it on my turntable to hear this song, when all I had to do was a fuckin’ Google search.”

Seriously? I have to write that shit? On a blog that gets broadcast to anyone across the planet with an internet connection? Jesus.

Now, I suppose I could have just erased that shit, and went about my business, but where’s the fun in that? All of what I said above is still true for a bunch of other songs we’ve got lined up this year, and I believe it. Plus, it is kinda funny to read it back in retrospect, realizing what a moron I was.

But I severely digress.

In my defense (but just barely) Bill forgot his own song’s party was possessive, which apparently threw the YouTube search engine into some fuckin’ algorithmic tail spin that returned nothing but My Little Pony videos instead of the 70’s monster song that all of my viewing history should’ve alerted YouTube that I was actually looking for. That, and no one had yet linked Bill’s video on Discogs. No excuse, ultimately, but I’ve since corrected that little error too. Twice over now.

Interestingly, Bill provides this bit of insight on the video’s description:

“I recorded this in 1973 and released it on Dart Records. We recorded at Chappells studio and called ourselves The Monsters. I think we released it just prior to Halloween. We did the rounds on Capital Radio etc and I have photographs of me with fangs and a facefull of black and white makeup. Those were the days!!!! We had quite a few sales but not enough to get in the charts I am afraid!”

That’s some solid firsthand info right there. He even tossed in a shout out to Halloween. Double bonus. Let’s go for the hat trick!

The upshot of actually purchasing this 45 was that the seller included an awesome promotional sheet. Check this shit out!

Now that’s what I call a win.

Not sure if I’d call this a “disco beat” though. But hey, Dart’s gotta sell this shit to, I dunno, whoever the hell’s in the market for Monster music in 1974. Disco freaks? Beats me. Was anyone even into Disco in ‘74? Was Disco even Disco in ‘74? Cause this shit don’t sound like Disco to me, so maybe Disco was different then.

Either way, that’s of no concern to us really, cause this song’s great however you classify it.

But we should address the cause of this whole YouTube search fiasco to begin with; that apostrophe S.

Cause this is the night of the Monster’s Party, as we previously discussed. It’s possessive. Now, Bill forgot that part, leading to our search debacle, but even Dart Records here seem to be confused. The 45 says Monster’s, and this promotional sheet says both Monsters and Monster’s. Ok then.

I’m going with that Monsters shit is a typo, and it’s Monster’s. It’s their party.

But wait. These guys singing are The Monsters. So that’s a extra layer of confusion. Is it their party?

Now, they’re not these Monsters, who are also Monsters from this exact same time period, not to add further confusion or anything. These LARPers in the graveyard here aren’t from Britain. But well get to them, and their own “Disco” monster jam in just bit.

Back to this party.

Now, in the event you’re thinking thus might be some kinda backstage, monster groupie, sex drugs and disco-get-together, fear not. The lyrics set the record straight pretty quick.

In an old castle, Dracula, Frankenstein and the Werewolf are dancing to a song. Not this song of course, cause that wouldn’t make much sense and I’m pretty sure Monsters don’t actually listen to this kinda shit. But they’re dancing to a tune. 74? I’m gonna say it was Dark Lady by Cher. Why not?

But then the Mummy shows up later and gets scared by some other bloodsucking vampire, I guess. Even Dracula’s Daughter joins at one point! She might be the scary vampire. Unclear. But what is clear is that these are the real titular Monsters, and thus the party is their’s.

They say it’s happened all before, which is weird. Perhaps these guys do this a lot. Or maybe they’re just referring to The Monsters Hop (not possessive), or possibly even the Midnight Monsters Hop (also not possessive), or the dozens of other “Hey, let’s have Dracula dance around with Frankenstein while Wolfman plays the bass or some shit” songs, cause why not, right? If they got together, monsters would grab instruments and dance and party and eat plasma pizza, would they not?

The most curious lyric though is the warning, for us the listeners, to lock our doors. Why? These monsters all seem pretty occupied dancing around in this old castle. The one chick’s hungry from some monster pie, what the fuck that is. She tryin to eat one of these dudes? She just tryin to get balled out at this party? What’s her deal?

There’s no indication that they’re heading out afterwards to tear up the countryside. Maybe do a little fuckin, but that’s upstairs. Chances are, if these dudes weren’t singing to us about this soirée, we wouldn’t even know it was happening at all.

I’ll lock my doors all right, don’t worry about that pal. But not because some literary characters are dancing with a creature I’ve never seen before in an old castle I don’t live anywhere near. Pretty sure I’m good, bud. I appreciate the warning and all, but I’m not too concerned about this party spilling out onto the streets of Los Angeles. The pantsless meth-head posted up in a tent on the corner, shouting into a pay phone that hasn’t worked since 2005 is all the motivation I need to keep those fuckers fully bolted.

Unnecessary warnings aside, kicking off our Referential Monster of a year in perfect monster party fashion, with a little help from the Mysterioso Pizzicato no less, it’s The Monsters with The Night of the Monster’s Party.

 

 

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Monster Christmas Mash (1974)

So, here’s a slice of bizarro-70’s-monster-weirdness I wish I knew existed back in 2018 when we did our Christmas episode of Shindig Radio. It’s the exact sort of thing I was trying to include.

Thankfully, it’s here now,  so let’s talk about it.

Back in 1974, it would appear as though someone just casually listening to Boris Pickett’s Monster’s Holiday and thought it would be a great idea for an entire novelty concept album.

And they were right, cause this thing is awesome.

Now, it’s not exactly the same as Monster’s Holiday because the monsters don’t rob Santa, as they plan to do in Boris’ song. What’s happening here is that Frankenstein’s Monster is sick and dying. Ok, off to a weird start. But then, just going right along with the weirdness, he laments that he’s never been invited to a Christmas party.  So, as some kinda Make-A-Wish Foundation move, the Association of Monsters decide to throw him a Christmas Party.

It’s a bizarre concept, no doubt, but it features a couple of fun new monsters tunes, a few classic Christmas carol renditions and some fantastic voice acting.

So, if you’re feeling like your Christmas is lacking a little Monster action, fire this thing up, because it’s one monstrously jolly listen.

 

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Frankenstein 1984 (Monster Rap)

TRACK #297:

Frankenstein 1984 (Monster Rap) by Edgar Winter

Have you ever thought to yourself…

“Man, I really love that Edgar Winter’s Frankenstein, but I just wish it had more synths, ya know? Like some newer synths…and maybe even a drum machine, yeah! And hey, what if it had some lyrics too, ya know, instead of being an instrumental? And dude, the lyrics could really be about Frankenstein, so it would actually be a real monster song! And oh shit, what if Edgar himself, weirdo, freaky 70’s looking, literal-ass whitest dude ever was rappin’ all over the motherfucker?”

Well my friend, have I got some good news for you today, courtesy of Edgar Winter’s very own Frankenstein 1984.

Yep.

Now, why Edgar decided to update Frankenstein, I couldn’t say.  I wasn’t able to find any interviews with him talking about this particular version. But my guess is, Edgar is a pretty experimental guy. The original Frankenstein was the first ever #1 hit to heavily feature a synthesizer. And Edgar is perhaps the inventor of what we think of today as a keytar, as he was the first one to strap the ARP2600’s keyboard around his neck.

As synthesizer technology and their use in popular music grew over the decade or so following this hit, I’m sure Edgar wanted to take another stab at it and incorporate more electronic instrumentation.

Now, why…in addition to this…Edgar decided to remix a slightly different version of the song and then rap over the top of it…that’s about anyone’s guess. As we’ve reckoned many times here on The Shindig before, Rap was starting to emerge as a legitimate musical force and in those early days, everybody decided to take swing.

So let’s thank Edgar Winter for deciding to throw his hat in the ring and take a song with dubious connections to both Halloween and Frankenstein himself and turn it into the full-blown epic Monster Rap we always wished it could be.

He even went so far as to call it the Monster Rap version. 

Legend.

 

 

 

 

 

Audio

Dr. Frankenstein’s Disco Party

TRACK #296:

Dr. Frankensteins Disco Party by Johnny Wakelin

Dashiki enthusiast and suspected racial appropriator Johnny Wakelin sang a lot of songs about boxers. Not the dogs mind you, but dudes who put on gloves and punch the shit out of each other.

Over a roughly 30 year span, Johnny released 12 different songs about boxers. Of course Muhammad Ali, Lennox Lewis, Frank Bruno and Mike Tyson each got 2 a piece, but that’s still no mean feat.

It all seemed to start in 1972, when he wrote a song called Hungarian Superman about Hungarian boxer Joe Bugner.

Apparently no one cared though.

Then Joe Bugner lost to both Muhammad Ali and Ghost Fever star Joe Frazier. 12 rounders to be sure, and by decisions, but still L’s none the less.

So, Johnny figured he’d just rework Joe’s tune to be about Muhammad Ali and call it Black Superman instead. Keen.

This time people seemed to care. Well, at least a little. The song hit number 7 in the UK. It only reached number 21 here in the states, but it stayed in the top 100 for 6 months! Not too shabby for a weird ass tune from some British guy about an American boxer.

Figuring if it ain’t broke it ain’t broke, Johnny whipped up In Zaire, a song about Ali’s famous 1974 bout dubbed “The Rumble in the Jungle” against George Foreman. That one didn’t do as well, but still had some legs.

After a few underperforming singles including Africa Man, Cream Puff and Afro Afrique, he attempt to rebottle the lightning with 1986’s Bruno, about boxer Frank Bruno.

That didn’t do so hot either.

Later down the line Johnny thought, fuck it, I’ll write songs about all kinds of boxers including Sugar Ray Leonard, Prince Nassem Hamed and even my own hometown hero Rocky Marciano.

Now, you may be thinking “Gee, that’s real swell, pal, but what the fuck does that have to do with Halloween, you blithering jackass.”

A fair question.

Well, it seems that in the middle of all this pugilist pop, and for seemingly no good reason at all, ole Johnny decided to jump on the disco train and bring some of that spooky monster party shit with him. What?

So, he grabbed up an instrumental disco tune from Harold Faltermeyer – yep Top Gun, Fletch Theme, Axel F Harold Faltermeyer – and slapped some silly Monster Mash-fashioned lyrics over the whole thing.

The result was Dr. Frankenstein’s Disco Party, a bonafide Monster Disco jammer that’s as grooving as it is bizarre.

Seriously, this song rules. And it hits all the notes you want for a monster party disco hit. You got Dracula, Mummies, Zombies, fuckin Bigfoot and even a nod to Frankenstein’s Monster himself. Hell, all the invitations to this Shindig are delivered by bat for fuck’s sake. It’s incredible! Johnny should have ditched the boxing motif and stuck with the monster parties, you ask us.

So let’s say gold riddance to this disco block with a little underground groove about a bunch of bloodaholics.

 

Audio

Dracula Disco

TRACK #295:

Dracula Disco by Gerry Bribosia

Unfortunately for everyone listening, that’s not where the “Disco Dracula” ends.

Cause every once and a while The Shindig stumbles across a song that’s definitely not good, but not totally unlistenable, that practically insists upon itself to make the playlist.

Dracula Disco is just such a song.

Because where else do you put this? Where else does this thing get the nod? When else does this song get its day?

But maybe it shouldn’t get its day, because that place doesn’t exist. Maybe it should just get buried in a hole somewhere where you put uninspired, and dubious cash-in trash like this.

Well, unfortunately for that hole, such a place does exist. And that place is Halloween Shindig. And that day is today.

But holy shit. This is the kind of thing that give disco a bad name.

Say what you want about something like Soul Dracula, or Disco Blood, but those songs cut rugs. This shit…this Dracula Disco shit…this is bland, repetitive, cash grabby garbage. Hell, it barely qualifies as music. You can’t dance to this shit! Isn’t that the soul purpose of disco, to at least get your feet moving? What is this song’s purpose? Who is this song for? It’s definitely for us, right now, in hindsight. But I mean in its day, to whom was this appealing to? To whom was this being sold, I ask!

Not gonna lie though, this guy does a pretty good Dracula, but the song isn’t asking much of him in the way of singing. Also, his party is poorly attended and whack as fuck. What’s he got? 2 guests and some lights? A little music? Well, if it’s shit like Dracula Disco, count me out, Conde.

Where’s the cavalcade of monsterous party goers? Where’s the plasma pizza or the blood ballon race? This party doesn’t even have a spooky DJ. This party is lazy and so is this song.

Unfortunately, lazy though it might be, it’s exactly the kind of thing that needs to be on this playlist. Because, where else do you put a thing like Dracula Disco, if not in a trash can?

Also, that LP cover is pretty fantastic. Dude has a coffin guitar, so what the hell.