The Darkest Side Of The Night

TRACK #234:

The Darkest Side of the Night by Metropolis

The Friday series was no doubt long in the tooth and well past it’s prime by Part 8, but Jason Takes Manhattan still remains totally 80’s and appropriate when compared to subsequent installments.

Attempting to take the series in a fresh direction and shake the claustrophobic confines of Crystal Lake, the producers thought Jason should get into the Muppet spirit and take Manhattan. This isn’t a necessarily meritless approach, except for the fact that rather than New York, the action takes place on a much more claustrophobic cruise ship on it’s the way too Manhattan.

So much for that.

Despite being a highly derided entry for this very reason, I’d argue it’s actually the film’s saving grace. Thank God this whole thing doesn’t take place in Manhattan. I know it was the draw card, but it’s really where the film starts to fall apart for me.

Because it’s just weird seeing Jason takin’ it to the streets. Perhaps funny, I guess, but only for a gag or two, and then what? The movie isn’t quite sure it wants to be a full-on parody yet, and as such it has a bit of a Jason Lives vibe to it; not totally embracing its sillier parts, yet not committed to being a fully horrific affair either.

Jason Takes Manhattan does have a meaner streak than Jason Lives though, and sharper teeth. It’s self aware, but not all neutered like Part 6. So it’s got that going for it.

I would say Jason X, for all it’s millennial sensibilities and glossy lameness, navigates this sort of self conscious ground much more deftly. As such, I think it’s delivers a much more self assured spin on this series than either Jason Lives or Takes Manhattan. Even has some solid kills, and before Jason gets all Mechagodzilla meets Robocop, he looks pretty dope. But it’s still hard to get behind that movie.

That being said, Jason Takes Manhattan is still a Paramount Friday that’s 80’s to the max with Kane Hodder just giving it his all. So, for my money, its in a different sphere of Friday than everything after.

Of the Paramount 8 however, I do feel it might be least of the bunch. Depends on what day you catch me. I recently rewatched Part 6 this passed Friday the 13th and found myself more irritated with it than usual. Part 8’s pulling ahead of it for me at this particular moment.

But hey, what the hell are we here for? Not my unsolicited bullshit. We’re here for some music, and Part 8 ain’t coming up broke, depending on your musical proclivities. If you can get down on cheeseball 80’s Power-Ballad-lite Pop Rock, than Metropolis here has got you covered.

I actually wanted to include the song J.J. puts on right before Jason steals her pink flying V and smashes her head in, but apparently that’s not a real song, just some composite that was put together from 2 other songs. Bummer, cause that one rocks, Lita Ford style. Oh well.

Here’s Metropolis kicking off Friday the 13th Part 8 with The Darkest Side of the Night!

Anything, Anything

TRACK #233:

Anything, Anything by Dramarama

C’mon, ya’ll didn’t think we were gonna make it all the way through 2019 and not give ya a Freddy/Jason double header, did ya?

Naw, it’s tradition ’round here and this year we’re reaching back into The Dream Master’s bag!

And the treat we’ve pulled out is this 80’s Pop Rock classic that has much longer legs as a real standing hit than any association with Mr. Big Time.

However, associated it is and onto the Shindig it goes!

In the very ridiculous and very Karate Kid-inspired training montage from A Nightmare on Elm Street Pt. 4, you will here this Jack FM favorite.

The Dream Warrior Kristen Parker (who was here recast with theme song singer and Shindig inductee Tuesday Knight) is trying to piece a normal life back together. Part of that puzzle is her boyfriend Rick, who’s not too fond of her old “spooky” buddies Kincaid and Joey.

Sport-o Rick suits up early on to assure us that, if push comes to shove, Freddy ain’t getting to him without a fight.

He throws on one of Myagi’s spare headbands, hits the bag and flails a pair of nunchucks around to this not-particularly-tough but particularly-whiny popper from Wayne New Jersey’s own Dramarama.

Later, his sister Alice picks up the same nunchucks and Neo’s that shit with the quickness, also while listening to Anything, Anything.

If you think Rick looks kind of familiar, that’s because he plays nerdy shut-in lightweight Calvin in Sorority Babes in the Slimeball Bowl-O-Rama! How’s that for timing?

So come on! Verbally berate your girlfriend and try to buy her off while being totally self absorbed and not understanding at all why she’s not at all interested in marrying your needy asss. Hey, maybe even try to beat up her dad! That’s a good move. You can use some of Rick’s bitchin’ Taekwonkido!

Punch yeah!

Santa Monica Blvd. Boy

TRACK #229:

Santa Monica Blvd. Boy by Linnea Quigley and The Skirts

About an hour into Nightmare Sisters, we get something much more interesting, appropriate and better than anything Haunted Garage has to offer, no disrespect to Dukey intended.

That’s when Linnea Quigley’s succubus-possessed Melody grabs a mic and puts on a show.

Yep, that’s right. Linnea Quigley herself sings this inclusive track and permanently seals her fate upon The Shindig.

When a Scream Queen (particularly one as beloved by this blog as Linnea Quigley) sings an inclusive (or hell, non-inclusive….more on that later) it would be a crime against the holiday not to include that upon our Hallowed list.

Linnea seems to be detailing a problem in which a boy she’s been seeing has left her for another person. A boy, in fact. A Santa Monica Blvd. Boy, even.

This boggles my mind. Not that this boy might leave Linnea for another boy. That’s fine. Do you’re thing, pal. Sexuality can be a tricky and grey spectrum which can defy all conventional categorization. No judgements here, friend. In fact, I’d like to extended a gracious “thank you” for freeing Linnea so that she might pursue a more meaningful physical relationship with say, oh i don’t know, me.

No. What boggles my mind is that he would leave her at all. This boy is obviously confused and looking for love in a place other than the vicinity of Linnea Quigley. Ok, don’t get that, but fine.

If I may, Linnea. I’d like to politely suggest that, rather than feeling forlorn over this dear confused chap, you could move onto one of the,.. shit, I’ll conservatively say tens of thousands of other boys that will not only not leave you for some other boy, but not leave you at all for any other person period. Just a friendly recommendation.

All kidding aside (seriously though Linnea, I can be reached at ed@halloweenshindig.com) it is our utmost pleasure to officially add Linnea Quigley to the roster of performers on Halloween Shindig, with her upbeat and inclusive track Santa Monica Blvd. Boy!

Sorority Sister Succubus

TRACK #228:

Sorority Sister Succubus by Haunted Garage

Right on the heels of Sorority Babes in the Slimeball Bowl-O-Rama, David DeCoteau grabbed up Linnea, Brinke, Michelle and most of the crew, then ran across town to began shooting this sister film. 4 days later they had Nightmare Sisters in the can.

Another silly and scandalous horror/nudie/sex comedy from DeCoteau and company, Nightmare Sisters is a fun flick that would make a great double-feature with Bowl-O-Rama.

We mentioned Dukey Flyswatter in our last post, as he provides the voice of old Uncle Impy. Dukey also appears here, in his human form, as the opportunistic mystic Omar.

Dukey Flyswatter, however, is just the stage name of actor/singer/writer Michael Sonye, who also happens to be the lead singer of L.A. splatterpunk outfit Haunted Garage.

As such, Haunted Garage provides 4 different tracks for Nightmare Sisters and our selection this evening, Sorority Sister Succubus acts as an introductory track, running over the film’s opening credits.

What better way to follow up a David DeCoteau sorority flick without a title track, than with another David DeCoteau sorority flick with an almost title track about sorority sisters from a movie called something else?

Yeah, we couldn’t think of one either. Enjoy!

Here In Darkness

TRACK #227:

Here In Darkness by Greg Stone

If ever a movie was crying out for a Title Track, it might be David DeCoteau’s 1988 cheeseball classic Sorority Babes in the Slimeball Bowl-O-Rama.

Unfortunately, we’re not that lucky.

However, we do get the superbly 80’s and synthed-out pop number Here In Darkness.

Could this have been a Title Track? Eh, maybe. That’s a hard Title to squeeze into any melodic structure, much less this one, which is pretty tight. Additionally, and probably more applicable, the film was originally (and more lamely) titled The Imp.

Legend has it (read: IMDb trivia) that Charlie Band himself held a contest at Empire Pictures to retitle the movie. Bitchin’ Sorority Babes in the Slimeball Bowl-O-Rama was chosen. However, the MPAA, purveyors of quality changes the industry over, decided “bitchin,” (despite is non-derogatory use) wasn’t stickin’ around. Plain old Sorority Babes it is.

Which is fine by me, as the Sorority Babes themselves aren’t all that bitchin’ to begin with. Now, B&E babe Linnea Quigley’s Spider, on the other hand, is plenty bitchin for the lot of them.

But anytime you get Brinke Stevens, Michelle Bauer and Linnea Quigley tag teaming on a sumbitch, you’re in for the goods, full stop.

Now throw in Stoogie from Night of the Demons, Valerie from Slumber Party Massacre, career Bum and literal dude that’s basically been in everything Buck Flower, plus a Dukey Flyswatter voiced puppet Imp with attitude to spare and you’ve got all the makings for a late night, low budget cult classic in waiting.

So grab a brewski, a bowling trophy and a Tri Beta paddle and join them all Here In Darkness!

He’s Coming Back

TRACK #225:

He’s Coming Back by Chris LeVrar

While attempting to pull some samples from Repossessed for its Title Track, I naturally stumbled across this end credit oddity, which can only be called a gem when you host a playlist like the one I’ve constructed here.

A highly referential Monster Rap Sweet Song? Oh, this is going on the playlist for sure, I don’t care how bad it is.

That this is my knee jerk reaction is a bit of a shame, because this song is bad. And I mean it’s bad, so I apologize for that.

So bad in fact, that you happen to be looking at the proud recipient of 1990’s Golden Raspberry Award for Worst Song from a Motion Picture.

I hope you all can understand and appreciate it’s inclusion. My compulsive need to include inclusive (and referential) Monster Raps Sweet Songs prevents me from treating this thing objectively, or considering your overall enjoyment of this playlist. But my hope is you can at least see why, when stumbling upon something of this nature, it has to be included.

Well, either way I apologize.

In fairness, the verses aren’t so bad. It’s really the chorus here that’s dragging this whole track down. But lyrically, you’re getting a heaping helping of allusions to the film, plenty of bizarro lines and a rhyme structure that is off-center, to say the least.

Not helping matters is it’s length. It’s crazy to me to think Repossessed had enough credits to sustain a 4 minute song. For real? That many heads on Repossessed? They must roll at an unnaturally slow pace, cause I don’t know what the hell all those people were doing.

I will say, I wish I had rediscovered this thing earlier so we could have had the chance to really dig into this one on our Monster Raps episodes. Oh well. Perhaps we’ll amass enough new Monster Raps to warrant a Part 3. Fingers crossed.

In closing, I do hope that somewhere, someone listening to this playlist actually likes this song. Or at the very least, appreciates the necessity of it’s inclusion, because I’m fairly sure they’ll be the only one.

Repossessed

TRACK #224:

Repossessed by Cindy Valentine

While certainly not what I’d call a good movie or even all that funny, you can do a lot worse than 1990’s Horror Spoof Repossessed. Namely Transylvania 6-5000. But I digress.

The best thing going for this silly slice of parody is Linda Blair. Landing the star of the original film you’re spoofing is a big play in this racket, and here she does a fine job lampooning herself, tongue firmly in cheek. It’s neat just to see her there in the blue dress taking a poke at herself and it goes some distance to endearing this movie to a certain audience.

I’m also a sucker for Leslie Nielsen, though I have to admit, his accent takes me out of this one a little. This is not one of his crowning comedic works, but it certainly beats Spy Hard or 2001: A Space Travesty.

A lot of the jokes here don’t land well, but there are a number of smaller gags that I think work and produce some genuine laughs. This, however, is not the gold standard of horror parodies, by any means. Hell, it ain’t even a copper standard.

Making all of this a little easier to ingest though is its upbeat Title Track from Teen Witch’s own Cindy Valentine. A second (hell, maybe even 3rd or 4th) tier 80’s pop singer you may or may not be familiar with. I vaguely recognized a couple of her bigger hits (from where exactly, I could not say) but if you had no recollection of ever hearing any of her assembly line genri-pop, that would be perfectly understandishable.

I’ve yet to hear a Cindy Valentine song I didn’t like and that very much includes Never Gonna Be The Same Again from Teen Witch. But in fairness, I haven’t listened to the breadth of her catalog. I’m sure there’s some turkeys in there, even by my admittedly dubious standards.

But here it is, my personal pick from the crop of Bad and Ugly Title Tracks of Episode 8, it’s Cindy Valentine with Reposssessed!

Transylvania 6-5000

TRACK #223:

Transylvania 6-5000 by Paul Chiten

Since I basically read the write up for this song on Episode 10 of Shindig Radio, I’ll spare you all the tedium of posting a direct transcript.

The short version is that Transylvania 6-5000 gives you 2 different Title Tracks and hey, isn’t that swell.

The other Title Track, which plays as a Sweet Song during the end credits, is a direct spoof of Glenn Miller’s Pennsylvania 6-5000 and its serves a nice coda to the film.

And despite how I may feel about that film, which is not terribly positive, I love this Title Track which plays right at the beginning of our ill-fated adventure.

Paul Chiten delivers the goods here with a very referential and appropriately 80’s pop theme the fits the movie quite nicely.

One thing I failed to mention during the show, is that the film actually apes it’s title from a 1963 Bugs Bunny short. This may make the allusion to Glenn Miller’s 1940 big band hit a little bit more understandable; 23 years on verses 45.

Another thing I’d like to address here is, on the show Kyle and myself answer Mikey’s question about the nature of the 6-5000 incorrectly. We both quickly state it is the hotel’s address, when in fact it is the hotel’s telephone number, PEnnsylvania 6-5000, in accordance with the old telephone exchange system. What can I say? Research is not our strong suit and confident misinformation flows freely. C’est la vie, it would seem. Je suis désolé, mon Mikey!

And with all that said, we’ll just follow the best thing about Transylvania 6-5000, with the 2nd best thing about Transylvania 6-5000.

Skullduggery

TRACK #219:

Skullduggery by Anonymous

Are you into D&D, community college theater or weird masquerade sex-parties that feature no sex?

Yeah, I didn’t thi…

Wait, what? You are? Oh…all right then.

I still don’t think I should recommend 1983’s Skullduggery though, even if you have the added perquisite love for low-rent, bizarro horror movies produced by alien-people making lots of real confusing decisions.

I’m pleased to report it does feature a surprise reference to Halloween though, as you will hear attached to our next sonf, which is a totally out of left center Title Track that caught me right off guard. Skullduggery coming hard right out of the gate, huh? If only the film followed through on such a promise.

On the 1st part of Shindig Radio’s Title Tracks retrospective, we did a fair amount of clowning on this Scooby-Doo theme of a song which sounds dated even for its time. Mikey likened it to a 70’s television drama, ala Fantasy Island, and we think you’ll agree.

Despite a couple laughs had at its expense, I rather enjoy this Title Track. It’s got a good beat and is suitably mysterious, much like the plot of its namesake, Skullduggery.

Speaking of the film, you can soft pass on Skullduggery, unless you’re feeling hard pressed for something you haven’t seen before and aren’t too protective of your free time.

I will say, if you do decide to watch the film, you’ll hear this song featured prominently over its “we couldn’t really figure out how to not make this just a plain blue screen” credit sequence, which perfectly informs the next 90 minutes or so you’ll be spending with Skullduggery.

Personally, I recommend spending at least 2 minutes with it, which is just enough time to enjoy this weirdo Title Track.

Can you see,…what’s in my eyes?

Skullduggery!

Prom Night

TRACK #218:

Prom Night by Paul Zaza & Carl Zittrer

And now, we have our first track to make its debut on Shindig Radio before being added to the playlist, and what a perfect song for that honor.

An 80’s disco Title Track for the slasher classic Prom Night, composer Paul Zaza cranked out a doozy with this one. Perfectly capturing the mood of the film and the vibe of its era, Prom Night is, at least sonically anyway, a fantastic Title Track.

Featured during the film’s climactic Prom sequence, it’s catchy, danceable and more importantly (like any good Title Track) it repeats the title ad nauseam.

Though, as noted by The Shindig Radio crew, that’s about where any references to either this movie or even an actual Prom, end. Which is a shame, as just a little bit could have gone a long way to taking this from just a passing Title Track to something really great.

No matter, because despite how Graham Schofield may feel about this cut, it’s unused sister Title Track or dancing disco bullshit in general, I think this song boogies.

Allegedly, this sequence was shot with a bunch of popular disco tunes playing in the background. Once the producers realized it might cost them a small fortune to secure the rights to such recognizable hits, they tasked Paul Zaza with recreating reasonable facsimiles as replacements.

Unfortunately, he only had about a week to do it.

Given the tight timeline, I think Paul knocked this one out of the park, creating a disco slasher Title Track for the ages.

Just remember, it’s not who you go with, it’s who takes you home.

Everything is all right!

The Monster Club

TRACK #211:

The Monster Club by The Pretty Things

On the surface it might seem like The Monster Club and Halloween Shindig would go hand in hand; a horror anthology starring such genre vets as Vincent Price, John Carradine, Donald Pleasence and Britt Ekland, that has tons of fun monsters and masks plus numerous monster related musical numbers? It’s a no brainer, right?

And it’s true, we love The Monster Club. It’s kinda like Night Train to Terror, only it’s coherent and cuts back to different and actual songs. It has a fun premise, with 3 solid monster vignettes and a spooky, synthy score.

So what’s the problem? Where’s the “but” that has kept this blog for talking about it for 7 years now?

That, dear readers, is my own prejudice against those same monster related songs. I kinda hate them. I don’t want to, but I kinda do. I want to love them. I want to include them all and have wanted to since the beginning. But I’m just not a huge fan.

I’ve tried, over the years, to warm up to them but the love just never seems to flows out of me. They have this late 70’s/early 80’s British new wave, pseudo-reggae, Clash meets The Police vibe that neither suits the movie, the songs or me, despite their monstrous leanings.

Because I think it needs to be represented and because I do quite enjoy the film, Halloween Shindig has decided to include the tune I’ve warmed up to the most. Performed on camera by The Pretty Things, it also happens to be (perhaps not so incidentally) the film’s Title Track.

After discussing over 30 different Title Tracks across 6 or so hours on the podcast, how did we not mention this one? Well, as we noted, there’s a mountain of Title Tracks and we had to keep some in our pocket, no? Leave a few surprises for the blog still, right? And we may even have a few more up our sleeve this year.

Additionally, this seemed like an appropriate way to kick off the season and usher in a monster block of Monster Songs, which have been sorely under represented as of late.

Lead in here with Vincent Price’s overly long (and overly awesome) laundry list of solid reasons the Human Race deserves to be represented in a club full of horrible monsters.

So, fellow Shindiggers and Humans…

Welcome to The Monster Club.

Into The Fire

TRACK #207:

Into the Fire by Dokken

Dokken may be best known around these parts for their Elm Street power ballad Dream Warriors, but not only was this “B-Side” cut first, it appears first in Dream Warriors (during the opening credit sequence) and it reached a slot higher on the modern rock charts. That technically makes this their more popular hit. B-Side my ass.

For Freddy nerds however, the plot thickens.

When it came time to release the film on VHS, producer and New Line exec Bob Shaye didn’t really feel like paying royalties on Into the Fire, with which the theatrical prints of the film were screened.

Perhaps being a standing hit unrelated to the film it had a different deal than the Title Track did. Maybe it was just gonna cost too much to keep it in the film. I’m not sure exactly.

What I do know is that Bob had it replaced with an instrumental version of the Joe Lamont (a shindigger himself) track Quiet Cool (a title track even!) from the film Quiet Cool, which New Line also owned. Problem solved, right?

I guess.

That is until Digital Video Discs became a thing and everyone scrambled to re-release everything everyone already owned. When it came time for The Elm Street franchise to get the digital treatment, New Line opted to keep it real and release the theatrical version of the film, Into The Fire and all.

By then however, a generation of Freddy fans, who may not have ever seen the theatrical version (much less remember it) had now grown up watching their worn out VHS copies of Dream Warriors not hearing Into The Fire during the credits at all.

They were a little upset.

A glance through some Elm Street message boards or even YouTube comments will greet you with plenty of fans that actually prefer the Quiet Cool version. Some fans even think they replaced the original song with Into the Fire just for the DVD, not knowing that was the original track. Those fans tend to be even more upset.

That’s what familiarity and nostalgia will get you, because anyone who thinks the Quiet Cool version is superior is outta their mind, you ask me. I can see that making you miss the VHS version, but that’s where I’ll have to draw the line, because Into the Fire rules. Yeah, maybe it’s a little on the intense side for a sequence where Patricia Arquette is just mocking up 1428 Elm in paper mache, but when her mom busts in and tells her she’ll wake up the neighborhood, it seems a bit strange that she’s referring to a mellow instrumental.

Whichever version of Dream Warriors you prefer, there’s no denying that Dokken’s Into the Fire is a certified Shindigger.

So grab a spoonful of Maxwell house instant coffee, chase that shit with a shot of Diet Coke and crank this tune, cause Freddy’s waiting for you on the other side of that pillow, and he’s still pretty pissed about that whole “your parents burnt him alive” thing.

Lep In The Hood

TRACK #203:

Lep In The Hood by Warwick Davis

When it comes to Monster Raps, I’m a huge fan. A legitimate fan. I legitimately like these songs.

That’s not to say I don’t see why they’re ridiculous. But I like them. I bump them in my car. In a lot of cases, they’re actually good songs.

I can not say the same for this particular Monster Rap.

Don’t get me wrong, I love The Leprechaun. I love Warwick Davis. I have the box set. Vegas is awesome. Space is fun as well. Leprechaun in the Hood is a particular joy, and even Back 2 the Hood has its moments. But Lep In The Hood is not a good song.

I enjoy it. I love that it exists. It’s hands-down playlist material, but it’s a bad song, to be sure.

It could have been good too; with a better beat, some more inspired lyrics and a little more commitment than the halfassery on display here, this could have been a great Monster Rap.

But I’m not one to stare a gift horse in the mouth, and any Warwick Davis rapping as the Leprechaun is better than no Warwick Davis rapping as the Leprechaun, so hats off to the producers on that account.

Thank you for giving this to the World, even if the World doesn’t really appreciate it.

Rapula

TRACK #202:

Rapula by Dean Cameron

We’re gonna gonna keep the Monster Rap train rolling here for a bit with a Monster Rap performed by an actual Monster, Rockula.

This (essentially) 80’s Monster Comedy gets a little extra love from The Shindig for:

A.) Starring Francis “Chainsaw” Gremp, Dean Cameron.
B.) Taking place on Halloween and
C.) Featuring lots of music for use on the playlist.

Our next selection, perhaps the most sweaty of Rockula’s catalog, is his attempt to do what everyone was doing in at the in 1989…bust a rhyme.

It’s not as bad as you might think. It’s certainly not great, but it’s all in jest and there’s some funny lyrics, which is more than I can say for,…well it’s coming up at #203.

So, before you curse us for posting perhaps the worst Monster Rap in existence, give it a track or two before making any snap decisions.

Kick it!

On Our Own

TRACK #201:

On Our Own by Bobby Brown

Yeah, I think it’s gonna be another one of those funky ones…

Ghostbusters 2, the definitive statement on Monster Raps, continues its genre dominance here with perhaps its most popular track, Bobby Brown’s On Our Own.

Featured during a montage of the GBs kicking it into gear and revving up for a final showdown with Vigo the Carpathian.

Total side note here, but if you’ve never heard the skinny on Vigo’s painting, definitely check this out.

This track’s especially relevant in that Bobby Brown actually has a cameo in the film! His excitement at seeing the Ghostbusters emerge from ECTO-1a is a great moment. He asks Egon and Ray if he can get a proton pack for his little brother. Naturally, Egon flat out rejects this ludicrous proposal, while Ray halfheartedly agrees.

“I guess he’s right.” Ray responds.

You guess? Really Ray?

Am I to believe that if Egon hadn’t been there, then Ray would have seriously considered giving Bobby fucking Brown a proton pack? For his kid brother, no less?

I’m not sure if Ray should be allowed to handle such dangerous equipment if he doesn’t know well enough not to just hand it over to random citizens, or fucking children. Maybe dickless Peck was right all along.

Bobby Brown gets in on the action all the same, proton pack or not, serving up a Ghostbusters jam to beat all. Yeah, yeah, you know it.

Tryin to battle my boys? That’s not legal!

Bump In the Night

TRACK #197:

Bump In The Night by Dennis Michael Tenney

Whaddaya say we ring in the official appointment with a double dose of Dennis?

It’s difficult to talk about Kevin Tenney’s 1986 debut without mentioning it’s Sweet Song, Bump In the Night, performed by butt-rockers Steel Breeze, who have perhaps the silliest juxtoposition-as-band-name from an era built on such nonsense.

Steel Breeze? Seriously guys? The literal interpretation of that idea is probably the only thing saving it from complete stupidity. Or maybe that makes it worse, I’m not sure. Either way, it’s not even approaching tough. Just the word “breeze” itself is so passive, I don’t care if you throw “murder” in front of it, there’s no coming back. It can’t be toughened up. Though “steel” is a valiant effort, I suppose.

But enough about them though, cause they’re not even featured here, as The Shindig has opted for the similar, though artistically purer form of Bump In the Night from the song’s author, Shindig All-Star Dennis Michael Tenney.

His demo for this tune, while less polished or flashy than the falsetto strewn official from Steel Breeze, is better. Steel Breeze’s cut just feels like they’re trying to show off, and Dennis’ workmanlike approach is much appreciated in contrast.

Gone are Breeze’s unnecessary vocal flourishes, their wussified backing vocals, that flanger heavy intro, and it’s general Foreigner-ness,…not that I have anything against Foreigner. Oh yeah, and Dennis’ solo is way better, you ask me.

Naw, this version just has more heart, and it’s lyrics get the treatment they deserve from the man who penned them.

You’ll hear Dennis croon about how “the stairway’s a dragon,” or “the coat racks a madman” when you turn out the lights. Fair enough I suppose, logical conclusion do get harder to make,…as you lie there awake.

While it’s no The Beast Inside, what could be? Dennis is just gearing up for that opus here with Bump In the Night and it’s easy to see the seeds of that classic take root.

We were pumped to find this version of the track and allow Dennis stretch his legs a little more and really make The Shindig a place he can call home.

Originally intended for 1986’s Witchboard, here’s Dennis Michael Tenney’s demo for Bump In the Night.

Computer Date

TRACK #196:

Computer Date by Dennis Michael Tenney

Much like Halloween, Dennis Michael Tenney has been on the All-Star roster without proper representation for some time now.

And just like Halloween, we’re gonna make it official for him in 2018.

Of all Dennis’ many contributions to his brother Kevin’s Class of 1988 valedictorian Night of the Demons, Computer Date may be the most curious.

It’s featured prominently, and basically in its entirety, when the gang first arrives and starts partying down at Angela’s Hull House Halloween Hootenanny.

But why this cut? Lord knows. It’s definitely a rocking little tune suitable for the scene and pretty danceable. Evidence to it’s 80’s danceablity can be seen hereand here.

But it’s a strange sort of song. Kinda feels like something Dennis had laying around with enough of a beat to work with the scene. Not a problem necessarily, but what is this track all about?

What sounds like a pretty standard song about using a computer dating service turns into, I think, a bizarre situation where Dennis is fucking a robot.

Now, correct me if I’m wrong please, cause I’m genuinely unsure what exactly is happening in this song. She talks a little roboticly, about “stereo taping” the fucking and playing it back. And apparently they need a whole reel-to-reel, which to me indicates a fair amount of fucking.

I’m not sure if we’re told who or what she is exactly, but what we do know is that she can take some abuse without blowing a fuse. That sounds like that could be robot talk, but could just be metaphoric too.

The problem for me occurs around the line

“When I asked them what they thought made her so different

From any other girl I’d meet on the street.”

This could be a great indicator as to what’s happening, but for the life of me I can not figure out what the hell Dennis is saying.

I think it’s

” they said believe it or not,

she’ll come with drive and a slot

and that’s a combination never to beat.”

I dunno, kinda sounds like he’s fucking a robot.

Or just a chick that’s ready to go, I guess, and it’s all a double entendre.

I think his “computer” date is the computer. But I have absolutely no idea if that’s what he’s actually saying.

Maybe it’s just me. I dunno. Maybe I’m a pervert and I’m adding all this weird robot sex shit where it isn’t, but I’m not sure. Maybe I’ve just been watchin’ too much Westworld. I am pretty infatuated with both Clementine and Angela…so

Whatever the hell is happening, it’s always a pleasure to hear Dennis Michael, and at 3 tracks, that officially add him The Shindig All-Star Team,

Now batting, center fielder Dennis Michael Tenney with Computer Date.

Everybody But You

TRACK #195:

Everybody But You By Joe Turano

Have you ever seen Night Train to Terror? Well, if you have, I’m sure you were plenty confused by this bizarre and hastily edited repackaging effort passed off as a horror anthology.

See, unlike your typical anthology, Night Train to Terror is actually 3 separate and preexisting films, pared down to near incoherence and slapped together with a wraparound featuring God and Mr. Satan fighting over souls aboard a train headed to Las Vegas,…or Hell, or both, or maybe that’s just the same place.

Either way, it’s kinda like Dr. Terror’s House of Horrors, only there’s no Peter Cushing and it makes way less sense.

Despite how that sounds, Night Train to Terror is actually awesome. But that’s only because the movies it cuts up contain awesome things, well the parts they kept anyway. You get some legit gore, weird Satanists, nudity, a gnarly beheading, Nazis, some bitchin’ stop motion monsters, a budget Jimi Hendrix, Cameron Mitchell, and Richard Moll…twice! Which, I admit, sort of adds to the illusion that all of this was carefully crafted.

But, that’s not really Night Train to Terror’s doing, right? Well, maybe the stop motion is…I think. Hell, maybe even some of the gore is too. I dunno really, but here’s a claymation Richard Moll getting blasted by devil magic into a giant cross.Regardless of what’s actually new, it was Night Train to Terror that made the decision to use these 3 films and trim (read: hack) the fat (read: any sense the plots might have otherwise made) into whatever it is you’re presented with. Though, since I’ve never seen the individual films (Marylin Alive and Behind Bars, Death Wish Club and Cataclysm) I can’t say for sure, but what you get hints at maybe treasures to be discovered.

The only substantial thing Night Train to Terror is really bringing to the table is the same thing that brings it to The Shindig’s table – the incomprehensible and ridiculous Everybody But You aka, that really “annoying” song the film keeps cutting back to every 20 minutes.

And when I say ridiculous, I mean that in the least figurative way possible. This band looks and act so stereotypically 80’s you’ll swear you’re watching a sketch show parody of a generic 80’s group filmed in like 2010. But it’s not. It’s real. It’s the genuine article.

Leg warmers, big belts, teased hair, spandex, head bands, bold colors, low-rent breakdancing, a girl on a drum kit even though that’s probably a Linndrum you’re hearing and a guy holding a bass guitar when that bass line is 100% from a Juno-6.

Now, I put annoying in quotations above because that seems to be the general consensus regarding this track. Naturally, this is not how The Shindig feels however. Far from it.

By all accounts, its definitely a kind of annoying. It’s catchy and horrendously repetitive, but it’ll hammer its limited and frivolous lyrics deep into your brain and live there maybe even forever. It makes absolutely no sense in the context of the film (though a valiant effort is made) and seems completely out of place. Which sort of makes itself make sense, as this whole movie feels out of context, because essentially, that’s exactly what it is.

And just when you think you have heard the last of this song, it returns, between each segment, like an unwanted neighbor. But take solace! For the song will end when “Satan’s Cannonball” finally crashes into its final destination, killing everyone on board.

Oh wait, what? They’re singing again? How? Why? Oh,…God has spared their souls, huh? Well, at least the credits are rolling now. We’ll be saved by the score taking over, right?

Yeah, for about 40 seconds. And then, like the dishes in your sink, Everybody But You inexplicably returns to haunt you again.

So c’mon and dance with me…dance with me..

Everybody’s got something to do….

Sweet Transvestite

TRACK #194:

Sweet Transvestite by Tim Curry

And since we’re talkin’ about sweet songs and everything, nothing quite says “Halloween” without saying “Halloween” at all, like The Rocky Horror Picture Show.

Poor Tim’s been sitting in the Shindig Bullpen for years now, just waiting for the right opportunity to provide some relief.

And rowing away from Camp Arawak aboard Dr. Frank-N-Furter’s transsexual canoe seems as good a place as any for him to step in at last and provide a nice hanging curve-ball.

So here, at number #194, it’s Tim Curry’s trash-camp classic, Sweet Transvestite.

Sleepaway

TRACK #193:

Sleepaway by John Altyn

Aside for his contribution to Sleepaway Camp II: Unhappy Campers, and this (almost) title track for the 3rd installment, I’m not sure there’s a whole lot of info floating around about 80’s rocker John Altyn.

I did find this nugget though, from The Sleepaway Camp Official Website, where John talks a bit about himself and the music he did for SC 2and 3. Bonus.

I guess he wasn’t a fan. As you’ll hear in the song, that “Same old story” part toward the end was John taking a little jab at the script for Teenage Wasteland, which I guess he thought was pretty lame.

Can’t say I blame him really. As a franchise, Sleepaway Camp was never all that compelling, and I think there’s a little bit of a noticeable dip for the 3rd installment. And if you’re familiar with Sleepaway Camp IV’s troubles, or have ever seen the ret-conned and wildly uneven bootquel Return to Sleepaway Camp, you know things didn’t follow an upward trajectory.

But as far as late cycle slasher films go, it’s honestly not terrible. Pamela Springstein’s Angela is still very charming and is a pleasure to watch as she does her best here to have some fun with the overtly campy material.

The kills are all rather lazy and not terribly explicit. It takes place almost exclusively in broad daylight and all at a very leisurely, almost blase pace. It’s not to be taken all that seriously though, and for that we can cut it a fair amount of slack. It’s the Angela show, and for that it works well enough.

This song however, is pretty kick ass. It’s a “sweet song,” used during the end credits of the film. This is a term I just learned from John himself in the above interview, and will henceforth use constantly. In fact, I may even update The Shindig categories and add Sweet Songs. I love that this has a term, and there’s tons of them all over The Shindig.

Here’s the Sweet Song from Sleepaway Camp III: Teenage Wasteland, John Altyn’s Sleepaway.