As any of you who’ve listened to A Very Shindig Christmas are well aware, Shindig Radio personality Mikey Rotella cut a Christmas record back in Monessen, PA.

He and 3 other FX kids came together to form The Krypt Keeper 5, and they gave that toothless town something to smile about in the Winter of 2005.

A mixture of gorified Christmas standards and horrific originals, Deck My Balls: Seasons Beatings from the Krypt Keeper 5 stands as raw and singular testament to how shitty and boring it is in Monessen Pennsylvania, and just what kind of creativity that can stir in a bunch of isolated youths.

So pick up a couple cases of Iron City, fry up some chipped ham and grab your balls for the beating of the season.