michael jackson

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Doin’ It in a Haunted House

TRACK #372:

Doin’ It In A Haunted House by Yvonne Gage

Sometimes you just wish you knew a song existed sooner.

This would have paired perfectly with the 2022 addition, Stay the Night, which sounded suspiciously similar to Bon Jovi’s You Give Love a Bad Name.

But even earlier than that, this song would have fit in nicely with all the other Haunted House hits in 2017.

Or perhaps, if I had know about this tune even earlier, I could have thrown it where it probably belongs, directly after Thriller, because damnit if this isn’t the most shameless Thriller knock-off I’ve ever heard.

Ok, maybe Golimar, but that thing was tucked away inside some obscure Telugu musical that no one saw for 25 years. Additionally, it doesn’t sound anywhere near as similar to Thriller as Doin’ It In a Haunted House does, which released to the American pop charts within a year of Thriller’s debut.

So shameless is this tune, in fact, that it sample’s directly from John Landis’ Thriller video in the opening minutes of the song. That’s either some kinda balls, or just plain wearing it on your sleeve. Cause if they didn’t think people would go “Hey! That sounds just like Thriller!” then someone is outta their goddamn mind.

And apparently they did, with Yvonne Gage herself stating (at least in retrospect) that she expressed concerns over its similarity to Thriller. These concerns were brushed away by the production team and they moved forward with the tune.

And boy am I glad they did, because Yvonne Cage’s Doin’ It In a Haunted House is a glorious thing. Not only is a fairly groovin’ tune, because well, it’s basically Thriller, but it’s called fuckin’ Doin’ It in a Haunted House. That’s just fantastic. And it’s not played for laughs either, at least as far as I can tell. This doesn’t strike me a jokey tune. This is just a straight faced Thriller knock-off with a ridiculous goddamn title and it’s beautiful.

It’s not terribly often that a song just gets an instant spot on the Plyalist based on its title alone. Most of them, I need to at least hear first. But this one? I was basically of the opinion that if it was even remotely listenable, it was goin on there, no question.

Then, I fire it up and it’s some ridiculous Thriller knock-off on top of that? Where has this song been all my life?! There’s still gems to be uncovered, even after years into this juggernaut.

But let’s talk about this song, shall we?

Let’s start with Yvonne, who began singing (as many girls do) at her local church from a very young age. Soon, she joined a band called the Soulettes and they even released an album under the band name Love, but Yvonne had already moved on by then, singing back up for a guy named Captain Sky. From there she met producer Don Burnside.

In addition to introducing her to Ministry (of all bands, with whom she recorded in their ) Don also produced her first 2 albums.

Originally, Doin’ It in a Haunted House was envisioned as a “response” record in the vein of Lydia Murdocks Superstar. If you’ve never heard that tune, I recommend giving it a listen, as it’s pretty wild if you’ve never come across it before.

Sung from the perspective of Billie Jean, Lydia posits Michael Jackson’s No. 1 tales omits some pretty big details and she means to set the record straight.

That record also sounds suspiciously like Billie Jean, aping the bassline and basic rhythm.

That sort of thing isn’t unheard of either, though not typically so overt. In fact, Response Songs (or Answers Songs) are as old as recorded music itself. Take a look at that list to see just how many songs are in fact (a good many of which I was totally unaware were) response songs.

What you might notice missing from that list, however, is Yvonne Gage’s Doin’ It in a Haunted House.

And probably not unjustly.

Despite being sold as the “Female Answer to Thriller,” the lyrics do little to suggest this is anything other than a similiar-ish concept wrapped up in a package sounding entirely too much like Thriller.

At least Rod Temperton thought so, anyway. See, he was the co-writer of Thriller and he proceeded to sue Gage for copyright infringement. Nothing really came from the suit, with Yvonne herself stating that Rod didn’t so much want money as he wanted to simply kill her record. Which, in effect, it kind of did, with deals and appearances evaporating from Yvonne upon the lawsuits release.

Mission accomplished pal, cause I haven’t heard of this thing in 40 years of its existence and I’m looking for shit like this. I guess I’m just not looking hard enough. Or maybe just not in the right places.

But like we always say, these kinds of things can’t hide from The Shindig forever, even if they should have been on there since day 1.

If you’ve never heard this one before, enjoy! If you’ve long been a fan, what the fuck? Drop The Shindig a line, will ya? This is too good an addition for ya’ll to have been sittin’ on.

 

Audio

Thriller

TRACK #119:

Thriller by Michael Jackson

Thriller.

That’s it. That’s pretty much all there is to say.

I’m gonna say more, naturally, but I thought it was worth noting that that’s all anyone really needs to say.

“Thriller. That’s what’s next.”

“Oh, ok. Sure. Of course it is.”

If anyone at your party has a reaction any less than the one I’ve described above, they don’t deserve to be celebrating Halloween. Take their mask, steal their candy and egg them back to the Stone Age.

The last time I checked (which was yesterday) Thriller was still the biggest selling album of all time. What? That’s crazy. It’s 33 years old, how is that still true? It’s cause it’s Thriller, that’s why.

For no mere mortal can resist…and so on and so forth. Probably some horrible music industry warlock bullshit, you ask me. Stick that into your Google and search it.

But I digress.

Thriller’s reach far extends that of the horror genre, Halloween or this playlist. It literally extends to just about anyone who ever lived on this planet during the last 33 years and has functioning ear drums. That’s how huge it is. It’s the biggest thing on this playlist. It’s the biggest referential track ever recorded. How? How was such a niche song this fucking huge?

Well, I’d say it’s more the album than the song itself. Both Billie Jean and Beat It trump it in the singles department, no question. Thriller itself never hit number 1, staying in the Billboard 100 for 14 weeks but topping out at number 4.

You could make an argument for Ghostbusters being a bigger hit, as it was legitimately a number 1 record. But I’d say that’s about it. Nothing else comes close.  Though as much as I love Ray Parker Jr.’s Title Track (definitely the biggest Title Track ever recorded) it’s not quite Thriller. Though both were contemporaries that changed the way music was conceived, created and sold, Thriller still has a little something extra. That extra is no doubt Michael Jackson.
Though that’s to say nothing of the video, revolutionizing the young media form and setting a standard I still think has yet to be matched.

From Rick Baker’s werewolf transformation to his zombies, to the choreography, to the eerie quality with which John Landis imbues the whole proceedings. It’s unmatched and a Horror fan’s dream video.

And it scared the living shit out of me as a kid. Having greater access to the Thriller video than most horror movies, it absolutely haunted me. The werewolf transformation was an initial jolt. Then Michael suddenly becoming a zombie just fucked me up. What!? He was just singing to her, now he’s a zombie?

Though even more terrifying was that once the music stopped, the horror movie started. The girl taking refuge in the abandoned house and Michael and his zombie horde busting through every inch of it to get at her. He was just Michael Jackson! They were friends! Now he’s trying to kill her! That level of broken trust rocked my young mind.

Ah, but it was all a dream! There’s Michael. “What’s the problem?” He asks. A sigh of relief washes over me. It’s all ok.

But then, the absolute kick in the nuts. Finally, once I feel at ease again, there he is, turning around and looking dead at me with those fucking werewolf eyes. Holy shit….it’s not ok. Freeze frame. And a child’s nightmares were born. It still sends a little shiver up my spine every time I see it, all these years later.

The 3D Viewmaster I had as a kid didn’t help either. Remember Viewmasters? They looked like this:You held it up to the light and clicked through a wheel of stereoscopic photos.
We had a giant, Talking Viewmaster that looked like this:
It was cool pretty cool. The wheels were larger, scan-tron like cards and had audio accompaniment. For this Talking Viewmaster, we had this:

A few Christmas’ back, my mother had pulled the old boy out for my nephews to play with. I hadn’t seen it in years. I immediately recalled my youthful terror and scrounged for the Thriller cartridge. I needed to see it; the image that haunted me all my life.

Sure as shit it was there. And sure as shit, it still gave me the creeps. Holding it up to the light, I perched my phone as close to the eyepiece as possible. I needed to capture this.
Holy shit.

As an adult, It’s obvious to me that Ola Ray and Michael are clearly having fun and chuckling to themselves while taking these photos. Fright is at a minimum, but damn it if that wasn’t the scariest shit I ever saw when I was 7. I had to flick passed. Nope. Couldn’t handle it.  Still trips me out.
But anyway, back to the actual song. Of course you have Vincent Price, adding his singular voice and an air of authentic late-night 50’s horror double-feature flair to the entire affair. That mixed with the lyrical references and allusions all wrapped up it a supremely dance-able 80’s rhythm that no mere mortal can resist.

Each one of these facets gives Thriller its collective undefinable quality. And it’s a quality that all understand, as everyone at your party is about to dance. Seriously. I don’t care who they are or what they’re doing; drunk, high, tired, newly arrived, mid-conversation, about to leave, taking a piss – don’t matter. Just watch your guests, this song comes on and people flip the fuck out. It might take a second for everyone to register what’s happening, but once it does, that’s the ballgame, jack. Maybe it’s all that warlocking.

Leaving this one off your Halloween playlist is absolutely unconscionable. In fact, I’ll go so far as to say that If you asked 10 random people on the street for just 1 song they associate with Halloween, I guarantee every one of them will name Thriller.

It’s close to midnight…