Phantom

Audio

Phantom of the Opera (1980)

TRACK #407:

Phantom of the Opera by Marzio

For a Halloween playlist that basically didn’t feature a Phantom of the Opera song from like 13 years, dropping 2 in one season might seem a little over the top.

But as I was putting together that block of Classic Monster tracks to close out the 300s, this was my original song for the Phantom slot. But, as you’ll hear, it ain’t really much of a Phantom of the Opera song at all.

Sure, it’s called that. And they definitely say it, but I’m not really 100% on what this song is really all about. Turns out though, they say “haunted disco” a whole shitload. And, since I was also lining up a Monster Disco Block, it seemed like a perfect fit.

So, who says “haunted disco?” Why it’s Marzio, who I’d say is like an Italian Dio, but, ya know.

But like Dio, Marzio is the name under which Marzio Vincenzi released his sole LP Smoke on the Volcano. In addition to tonight’s tune, this album also features his disco take on the Deep Purple classic, hence the title, I guess anyway. Here’s a picture of him looking not at all like the guy you imagine is singing this weird disco horror song.

Prior to this solo venture, Vincenzi lent his vocal talents to a disco team-up of Italian musician Mauro Malavasi and sketchy business man Jacques Fred Petrus called Macho.

Macho’s big number was a 1978 cover of Chicago’s cover of The Spencer Davis Group hit (written by Steven Winwood) I’m A Man. This 17 minute exercise in keeping coked-up boomers on the dance floor for as long as possible is impressive in its ambition. It’s a jam too, but 17 minutes of anything is asking a bit much, even for notoriously long disco songs.

Thankfully, tonight’s tune is only asking about 6 minutes of our time, which should be just enough to throw down a few moves on the floor and head back to the bathroom for bumps.

Holding up the back end our Monster Disco block, here’s Marzio with Phantom of the Opera!

 

Audio

The Phantom of the Opera

TRACK #394:

Phantom of the Opera by Long Tall Ernie and The Shakers

In an effort to flesh out our Classic Monster Block, we’re gonna lean on our old friends Long Tall Ernie and The Shakers.

These guys should probably already be Shindig All-Stars by now, as their 1979 album Meet the Monsters plays like ready-made, 8 track Shindig Mini-playlist. However, this is only the second time we’re pulling from that album. And the last time we did? 2019! That’s 5 seasons ago! That’s enough time for us to have added most of this album.

But who knows, maybe one day Long Tall Ernie’ll suit up with the All-Star Team, lord knows he could.

For today, we’re just gonna let them fill the Phantom of the Opera sized hole, not just in this block, but in this entire playlist. evidently. Seriously, is this really the first legit song we’re getting about the Phantom of the Opera? In 13 years? That can’t be true. Hold on.

Ok, yep. It’s true, I guess.

You get Title Track goofballs Phantom of the Mall and Phantom of the Ritz showing up in 2022 and that’s about it. You could argue Phantom of the Paradise made an appearance back in 2017, but I still don’t think that qualifies as a legit Phantom of the Opera tune.

Man, that’s crazy. The Phantom of the Opera is a a huge iconic character to have just roundly ignored like that. I mean, you have Lon Chaney, not even Jr. mind you, but Big Daddy Chain, pulling out all the stops to create one of Hollywood’s original movie-magic monster transformations. And the whole thing it’s about music! How have I seriously hit on this subject ‘til 2025? I guess there’s just not that many songs about the Phnatom? I dunno if that’s true. I’m sure it’s not. I just don’t think I was looking, for whatever reason.  But hey, what are ya gonna do? We’re here now, ain’t we?

If you’re a real big Phantom fan that’s been patiently waiting for this blog to finally drop a Phantom of the Opera mini-playlist, I don’t know what to tell you. You never spoke up, I’ll say that much. I’ve yet to get one complaint about the lack of representation for Erik, The Phantom of the Opera, on this playlsit.

But, if that was you, quietly suffering like I’m not a DM shimmy slide away, tonight is your night. So let’s let Ernie and his Shakers introduce us all to…The Phantom of the Opera!

 

Audio

Is There a Phantom in the Mall?

TRACK #312:

Is There a Phantom in the Mall? by The Vandals

Speaking of Phantoms, we have another Phantom that made his debut on Ep. 19 of Shindig Radio, and that’s the infamous Eric!

Yeah, Eric. You know Eric, right? He’s just like Jason or Freddy except his generic and innocuous name still sounds generic and innocuous cause no one knows who the fuck he is. But he got a subtitle, all about his revenge, which you didn’t even know he needed cause you’ve never seen him before in your whole goddamn life.

Yeah, it’s weird, but it’s The Phantom of the Mall: Eric’s Revenge, coming to you direct from the old (and way awesomer) Sherman Oaks Gallery.

Phantom of the Mall: Eric’s Revenge is a fairly late-in-game, but still pretty fun, slashery take on the Phantom storyline featuring an all-star (if you’re The Shindig, anyway) cast.

You got Death Spa’s Ken Foree, Action U.S.A.’s Gregory Scott Cummings, Pee-Wee’s Morgan Fairchild and a pre-weasel Pauly Shore all doing their damnedest to try and turn this business into a legitimate franchise. It didn’t quite work out that way for them,  but it’s totally worth watching anyway. Maybe even more so. 

However, there’s still the matter of this song, from LA punk legends The Vandals, to contend with and reconcile. 

See, if there was ever a contender for “Almost a Title Track” then it was certainly this one, and we definitely should not have included it on Title Tracks Pt. 5. But I hadn’t really considered the  option of a Not Quite Title Tracks episode until after the fact. So, Eric just snuck on in, without paying his dues, just like he tried to do with the horror franchises, giving himself a subtitle like he was a somebody. The balls on this guy.

Cause, let’s face it, this track is flagrant two-time offender.

First, you got all these extra words, a Title Track faux pas from the jump. And it’s not just a simple addition either, it’s now a whole goddamn sentence, with punctuation no less!

And sometimes we’ll look the other way; He’s Rockula, The Toxic Avenger Theme, maybe even Midnight Again (but not fuckin’ likely, not after Eric’s transgression) but this one’s asking a bit too much.

Now, if that was all, then maybe all could be forgiven. But that’s not all, because this song title doesn’t isn’t even the name of the movie. Now they say, at one point in the chorus, is there a Phantom of the Mall, but when it came to titling the track, they went ahead with  Is There a Phantom IN the Mall?

And baby, that’s just not the title of this movie.

Call me a nitpicker. Call me a hair-splitter. Call me an imbecile for devoting so many pseudo-serious words in a comedically aggressive tone to one of the most inane topics for a full 10 years of my life.

That’s fair. You call me whatever you’d like. But facts is facts, Jack.

And while this is a shinning example of everything a Title Track could and should be in almost every sense of the word, it just ain’t a Title Track where it counts…the Title itself.

Later Eric. You almost had it.

All that being said, this a great Referentially Inclusive Almost Title Track that 100% deserves to be here today.

So go grab a hotdog on a stick and maybe even a gun, cause you’re at The Chopping Mall, and there’s a Phantom in there too, and his name is Eric, and he’s lookin for some revenge. Are you a phony security guard with an ostentatious dangly earring? Did you burn down his house just so you could put up the coolest mall the 80’s had to offer? Boy, I sure hope not.