Aside for his contribution to Sleepaway Camp II: Unhappy Campers, and this (almost) title track for the 3rd installment, I’m not sure there’s a whole lot of info floating around about 80’s rocker John Altyn.
I guess he wasn’t a fan. As you’ll hear in the song, that “Same old story” part toward the end was John taking a little jab at the script for Teenage Wasteland, which I guess he thought was pretty lame.
Can’t say I blame him really. As a franchise, Sleepaway Camp was never all that compelling, and I think there’s a little bit of a noticeable dip for the 3rd installment. And if you’re familiar with Sleepaway Camp IV’s troubles, or have ever seen the ret-conned and wildly uneven bootquel Return to Sleepaway Camp, you know things didn’t follow an upward trajectory.
But as far as late cycle slasher films go, it’s honestly not terrible. Pamela Springstein’s Angela is still very charming and is a pleasure to watch as she does her best here to have some fun with the overtly campy material.
The kills are all rather lazy and not terribly explicit. It takes place almost exclusively in broad daylight and all at a very leisurely, almost blase pace. It’s not to be taken all that seriously though, and for that we can cut it a fair amount of slack. It’s the Angela show, and for that it works well enough.
This song however, is pretty kick ass. It’s a “sweet song,” used during the end credits of the film. This is a term I just learned from John himself in the above interview, and will henceforth use constantly. In fact, I may even update The Shindig categories and add Sweet Songs. I love that this has a term, and there’s tons of them all over The Shindig.
Here’s the Sweet Song from Sleepaway Camp III: Teenage Wasteland, John Altyn’sSleepaway.
You’re Just What I’ve Been Looking For (Angela’s Theme) by Frank Vinci
Let’s take a little canoe ride from Camp Blackfoot across the lake to Camp Arawak for a 2 days overnighter with Angela Baker at Sleepaway Camp.
Mostly known for having the creepiest fuckin’ side-swipe ending of any generic Friday the 13thknockoff, Sleepaway Camp spawned several sequels and holds it own as a franchise that was able to climb out of Jason’s long shadow.
I’d love to post a gif, but I’d hate to spoil this for anyone that’s never seen it.
Ah, fuck it. This shit is 35 years old. If you haven’t seen this by now, I don’t know what to tell you, it’s just gonna get spoiled. Cause we can’t talk about Sleepaway Camp without talking about this ending. It’s the only thing that’s differentiates Sleepaway Camp from any number of faceless Friday clones.Horrifying.
Seriously. This shit still gets under my skin all these years later.
I had the fortune of seeing Sleepaway Camp long ago enough so that is wasn’t spoiled for me, and at an age where it could do maximum damage. And it did.
Given our current cultural climate, Sleepaway Camp tends to be derided as an artifact of Transphobia. Much the same way De Palma’s Dressed to Kill is now criticized.
And it’s a reasonable enough argument. If the sight of a girl with a penis was not frightening to you before, Sleepaway Camp certainly goes to some lengths making sure it forever will be. But, while I think that does support the argument against it, I think you can also cite those same lengths as reason why it isn’t perhaps wholly Transoygnist.
Like any good horror tale, Sleepaway Camp takes a social phobia (right or wrong) and uses it as a basis to create horror for its audience. I’m not sure the film is saying anything overt about that fear. Is it exploitive? Probably. But I don’t think it’s a condemnation. It’s not necessarily sympathetic either though, but films from the early 80’s rarely are in regards to any minority concern.
Now, you could argue that simply using a transgender reveal as a source of horror is insensitive, sure. You could also argue that by making a transgender character a violent and horrifying freak because of its transgenderism, and then having the other characters react as such, is just flat-out irresponsible. Thus you could condemn the film for perpetuating a negative cultural view of transgenderism. That is totally valid.
I think part of Sleepaway Camp’s defense though, could be that Angela’s transgenderism does not come from within her, but from an external source. She is forced into it by her adoptive aunt. Being abused into identifying as any gender against your will is wrong and itself horrifying. Almodovar’s similarly criticized The Skin I Live In also comes to mind here.
Considering this, one might argue that Sleepaway Camp is then perhaps even pro-transgenderism; a cautionary tale of the dangers (figurative or literal – mental or physical) of forcing anyone to align themselves with a gender they do not identify with. Maybe the biggest takeaway from Sleepaway Camp, intentional or not, is to let people just be who they are, whatever that is for them.
Additionally (for me anyway) the least horrifying aspect of this ending is the reveal of Angela’s gender. Sure, it’s part and parcel to the whole scene and its endurance, but there are several elements at work which give this scene its haunting quality. You could say they are thus making the transgender reveal horrifying, hence the argument against it. But I would say they are the factors, and not the reveal, which actually make this scene so horrifying. That might just be splitting hairs though.
Firstly, there’s the music. The piercing brass stabs are enough to set your teeth on edge by themselves.
Then there’s the build up. It’s abrupt and clumsy, but Aunt Martha’s characterization is so over the top and cartoonishly creepy, it is enough to give you the willies in context.
This is then followed by Angela’s guttural moaning. She says nothing. There’s no pleads of innocence, no explanations, just a heaving and animalistic breathing that send shivers down my spine still.
Then, the most effective part of this sequence, that wide shot. While this of course features the gender reveal, it is Angela’s frozen gaze which I’m actually disturbed by here.
This shot was made possible by life casting actress Felissa Rose’s face in the making the same horrifying look. They then turned that cast into a mask which was worn by a male actor. For me, this is the most upsetting part of the whole reveal; Angela’s static expression, made doubly creepy (and doubly static) by this horrifying mask.
It’s just stays there, frozen. And then the film freeze frames on Felissa Rose’s actual face and rolls the credits.
Credits over which you will hear this Shindigger, a creepy synth pop number seemingly written specifically for the film.
So whether or not this ending, or Sleepaway Camp as a whole, is something you find totally offensive and reprehensible, you can’t deny that it causes a deep emotional response, and that is something you don’t always get from this sort of lower-tier, copycat effort. And maybe that alone is worth the legacy.
From 1985’s made-for-TV Halloween bonanza The Midnight Hour comes this creepy curio with so much mid-80’s budget-pop pizazz it even features a Soundwave-styled vocorder performance. Radical!
Harry Belafonte’s daughter Shari (pops wasn’t big on creativity, I guess) stars in the film and sings this tune, perhaps fashioned after the recent mega-hit Thriller.
In fact, the whole project seems to be an attempt to cash-in on Michael’s occult success; semi-spooky, family friendly, monster-mash madness with a throwback, 50’s drive-in flare. And this tune, an ensemble dance number staged at a Halloween party, appears to be the piece de resistance.
Though clearly made for TV and a little toothless, The Midnight Hour is a pretty enjoyable and festive addition to anyone’s October line-up. It’s even a fair bit more creepy than something you’d imagine was just made for TV.
You’ll get some fun guest appearances too, from the likes of Spaceball’s King Roland, Clarence Boddicker, that one guy from 21 Jumpstreet, UHF’s R.J. Fletcher, Yori from Tron and The Reading Rainbow Dude who wore that bitchin’ visor on Star Trek. Studded.
Plus there’s tons of Halloween ambiance, creepy Thriller-Lite graveyard scenes, a lot of cool make-ups and FX, a bunch of fun Halloween costumes, more monsters than you can shake a stick at and this kickin’ ‘digger. What more could you want from an October evening’s Televison adventure?
Freddy Krueger: What can be said about the quintessential 80’s man-specter that hasn’t been said a thousands different times by a thousand different nerds? Who am I to pretend like I’ve got some groundbreaking shit to drop on you? I’m no one, and I don’t, so I won’t. I’m simply another nerd with a foolishly myopic blog, so I’ll just stick to the script.
Freddy (whether I’ve said this before or not I can’t recall) is the reigning champ of horror tunes. He owns the 80’s pop-music-via-monster-icon scene. The guy even cut his own album. He’s all over it.
Jason comes close, but the Friday people didn’t fully climb aboard this particular train until part 6, and they never really bought a ticket. Freddy was shoveling coal in it’s boiler room.
And from the jump too, as even his first outing got its own little referentially inclusive tune in the form of 213’sNightmare.
Well, who the fuck is 213? Apparently they’re no ones, as no one seems to have any information on these guys. Well, aside from the painfully obviously “they were some local LA band that provided this track” or the goofier and obviously nonsensical “they were Johnny Deep’s band” theory.
Whoever they were, they’ll go down in the Shindig’s book as they guys who churned out that thoroughly apropos end credit song from the original Nightmare On Elm Street, and baby, that’s enough.
So, up yours with a twirling lawnmower,…whatever the hell that even means.
Speaking of Paul Williams, let’s take this moment to segue right into one of Horror’s most beloved rock operas, Brian DePalma’s 1974 pitch-perfect send-up of the entire recording industry, Phantom of the Paradise.
Elements of Faust, Phantom of the Opera,Frankenstein, Portrait of Dorian Gray and even a little Dr. Phibesare all fused together to tell a tale of love, betrayal, fame and revenge set to the backdrop of the doped-out, sinister 70’s music scene.
Williams scored the entire film for DePalma, and stars as Swan, the unscrupulous producer who collects talents and souls for his Death Records label.
Phantom of the Paradise is unique, visually arresting, kinetic and humorous all in equal measure. From DePalma’s active camera, to Gerritt Graham’s flamboyant Beef, to Winslow’s killer Phantom disguise, to Swan’s bitchin’ giant, record-shaped desk, to the parodist music, to the satire – everything here just works, and works so damn well.
Even getting Rod Serling himself to handle the opening narration is like a stroke of genius.
Here we have the film’s final track, a rocking little number played over the picture credits, that has all the seeming of Satan himself speaking directly to Swan.
If you’ve never seen Phantom of the Paradise, give this pop-rock-horror-satire a spin this October. And if you already love it, watch it again, just for the hell of it!
While fairly understated and never quite as rousing as it seems like it should be, The Devil’s Men is a somewhat worthwhile endeavor, if only to see card-carrying good guy Peter Cushing all cloaked out and evil, raising a 10 foot, fire-breathing Minotaur statue he calls “lord.”
Oh yeah and all the creepy , robed Minotaur worshipers.
Oh yeah and them all exploding at that end. That shit is pretty awesome.
But it’s mostly worth seeing for the grooviest title track this side of Scream and Scream Again, which incidentally, Cushing also appears.
Paul Williams performs this number, but apparently not the same Paul Williams with whom many of you may be familiar with from his performance in and musical contributions to, Brian DePalma’s Phantom Of The Paradise. Naw, this is some other Paul Williams. Which is unfortunate, but not terribly surprising, as this Paul Williams doesn’t sound much like that Paul Williams.
But props all around anyway other Paul, cause this one’s a doozy.
However, much like the last 2 cuts in this True Title Track block, someone had it out for The Devil’s Men, someone who sucked at their job.
See, they took the movie and retitled it Land Of The Minotaur. Which (while in and of itself is a cool title) seems pretty unnecessary, particularly during the 70’s satanic panic where one would imagine a film called The Devil’s Menmight play just fine.
They also saw fit to removed a bunch of violence and all the nudity. Seriously? What’s next? Did they cut out an awesome Title Track too?
Yes! That’s exactly what they did, and they should be tried and hung for the successive severity of their crimes.
So, if you’re gonna watch The Devil’s Men, make sure you watch The Devil’s Men, and not Land of the Minotaur, cause it doesn’t have a whole lot going for it, and the censored version removes just about every reason there is to watch it at all. For shame!
Here, now returned to its former glory, it’s Some Different Paul Williams with The Devil’s Men!
UPDATE!
Ok, so weird almost 10 years after the fact Post Script on this number, but I was just watching the Christian documentary Rock: It’s Your Decision,
Aerobicide/Woman On Fire by Mary Hylan/Jill Colucci
For a certain type of 80’s horror junkie, Aerobicide might be a wet dream come true.
There’s a formulaic and totally telegraphed whodunit plot. There’s an impractical and ridiculously oversized safety pin as a murder weapon. There’s an awesome hard-boiled detective. There’s even awesomer private investigator played by 80’s cheeseball-badass Ted Prior. There’s cheap karate, a rake fight, nudity and no shortage of 80’s babes in workout gear getting physical.
But above all, there’s the absolutely relentless 80’s synth-pop soundtrack.
However, there are a couple injustices besetting this soundtrack.
Namely, it was never officially released. Why? This thing is great. And why hasn’t anyone resurrected it yet? Where’s Death Waltz Records on this forgotten gem of a soundtrack?
There are rumors of promotional copies floating around that were release in ’84. It’s also said that all of the songs were released separately on 7″ vinyls by their various artists. Good luck finding any of those.
Secondly, and most unfortunately, the greatest of all these tracks is featured so briefly in the film it beggars belief. Worst of all, it’s the film’s Title Track. What? This isn’t the song played over the credits? This is the song that gets barely a minute of screen time so as we can’t even steal it properly? What cruel ruse is this?
Perhaps it can be explained by the inexplicable decision to retitle the film Killer Workout. Why would someone do such a thing? Is Aerobicide too high-concept? Too confusing? Similar to Land of the Minotaur, it’s not a bad title on its own, but when you compare it to Aerobicide, it’s no contest.
And because of that, this song should be all over this movie, or at the very least played during the credits. As a people, we need this whole song.
But, beggars can’t be choosers, so well provide what’s available of that track and just lead it into the aptly titled Woman on Fire by Jill Colucci, cause what else can we do?
On a side note, if you happen to find the voice of Jill Colucci sounds a bit familiar to you, it may be because she’s responsible for the theme to America’s Funniest Home Videos. Ok, that’s pretty weird.
For now, take what you can get and try to grab a copy of Aerobicide for yourself, which was finally made a whole lot easier last year when Slasher//Video released both a DVD and Blu-Ray of a video transfer.
Oh, and keep and eye out for this spray paint, which predates the film Death Spaby about 3 years.
Coincidence? I dunno, but these 2 would make for one heaving, sweaty double-feature.
There’s an 80’s horror fan reading this right now. Aerobicide is their favorite movie, they just don’t know it yet.
Is that reader you?
HUGE UPDATE! OCTOBER 2022!
It’s happened, Weeners. The impossible has occurred. The original soundtrack to Aerobicide has been dug up, brushed off, given a new pair of spandex and is out dancin’ in front of Rhonda’s Workout as we speak.
Thanks to the incredible sleuthing skills of Gilles Nuytens, this incredible soundtrack finally comes to life. He found them, I don’t know how, but he found them. He has apparently cleaned them up and remastered them a bit too, and they sound great. Not gonna lie, because I’ve been listening to the VHS versions for so many years, they sound a little weird; pitched a bit differently, have a slightly different tempo and sound…off. But they sound good and clean.
Gilles doesn’t quite have the full soundtrack yet, there’s still a few missing tracks, one of which appears to be Woman On Fire, so I can only update the Title Track on this double shot, but boy is that good enough for me. If and when the other songs are unearthed, you better believe this fucker’s getting the full Super Soundtrack treatment over here at The Shindig.
Having somewhat given up hope on this one, I had stopped actively looking for these tracks, imagining if they popped up, one of the big horror labels would release a pressing.
If not for the vigilance of Shindig follower Austin Popdan, we’d still be without this knowledge.
Thank you Austin, and thank you Gilles. Hearing the full version of this amazing Title Track was a fantastic moment of pure joy I was never sure I’d experience. We hope all you Shindiggers enjoy it as well.
Click below to hear…and i never thought I’d say this…the full version of…
What better place to bring our Haunted House Rockin’ block to an end than here, at the Berber House with Hauntedween, a Haunted House Halloween Title Track?
While not a real haunted house, The Berber House is just a festive Haunted House, or rather a Haunt, which has hitherto been unrepresented in our block.
A staple of the season since well before I was brought to this plane of existence, The Haunted House is as much a part of Halloween as Trick-or-Treating, Jack O’Lanterns and slutty costumes.
High school kids in rubber masks weave through a thick mist of dangling limbs and fake fog, looking for their next mark.
Disorienting lights strobe to the beat of pneumatic pistons firing foam jump scares.
A chainsaw is perpetually chugging somewhere, sometimes roaring to life, but from where, you couldn’t say.
Grown adults tip-toe around dark corners, weary of things they know aren’t really out to get them.
The nervous shriek, the tough guys almost instinctively punch and the weirdos laugh uneasily.
Some are good and some are terrible, but they all have that same smell, that same vibe, the same excitement, and you should always treat yourself to at least one visit a season.
If you live around Southern California, I highly recommend Reign of Terror in Thousand Oaks. Skip Universal, Knotts and The Griffith Park Hayride, and check that place out.
Hauntedween is a low budget affair filled with that same sort of passionate home-town charm and love for the holiday you find in local Haunted Houses, and it features a killer lying in wait at just such a local Haunt. You can read The Shindig’s write-up here!
This Title Track (which it is gracious enough to give us) plays over a montage of the Sigma Phi frat boys rebuilding the old local Haunt in preparation for a holiday fundraiser to save their fraternity!
It may be awkward to say, and it may not make one bit of sense, but here it is all the same…it’s Hauntedween!
Ok, so Ghost Fever‘s a pretty shitty movie, right?
Oh, not sure you agree with me? Go see for yourself. I’ll meet you back here in 92 minutes
Alright, so now that we’re all on the same page, let’s talk this through.
I’m not sure how much Ghost Fever you actually came down with but chances are it wasn’t so much that you’ll be requiring any antibiotics.
That being said, I love Ghost Fever. It has the distinction of being the only movie where Sherman Hemsley plays corner man to Luis Ávalos as he boxes Smoking Joe Fraizer with the assistance of Southern ghosts. Well, the only one that I’ve seen anyway.
It’s also the only movie I’ve ever seen with a break-dancing mummy.
Now, that’s pretty awesome.
All of this however does not make Ghost Fever a good movie, it just makes Ghost Fever a singular thing, and that’s worth something. Admittedly, it’s a little more than hard to sit through, but if you can get behind a poor idea executed in the poorest possible fashion, with the most eye-rolling bafoonery this side of Pandemonium, it’s a certain kind of treat.
James Ross at Badmovienite.com probably puts it best in his humorous review:
“At times it’s like a live action episode of Scooby-Doo meets the Harlem Globetrotters. Except it’s not really fun, or funny, and there are no talking dogs.”
Well, there’s definitely no talking dogs, I’ll give him that. But I’m laughing (kind of), particularly when it decides to get all batshit crazy toward the end. It’s not always the kind of laugh Alan Smithee is intending, but a laughs a laugh, right?
Oh yeah, did I mention Ghost Fever is an Alan Smithee film? That oughta give you an idea of what’s going on here.
For those of you who aren’t familiar with Smithee, “he’s” a pseudonym the Director’s Guild of America allows a filmmaker to use if they feel too embarrassed by the final product and can demonstrate a lack of artistic control.
Yeah, so even actual director Lee Madden disavowed this pile. I’m not quite sure it’s that bad, nor it even so bad it’s entertaining by virtue, but it’s definitely bad, that much I can say with confidence. But, dear Weeners, it’s not without its moments and with the right amount of intoxicants and the right amount of friends with the right sensibilities, it could be the right movie.
Of course, here on The Shindig, we don’t talk about this kind of nonsense without merit or a cause célèbre and Ghost Fever (as you might imagine) has a fucking doozy.
Submitted for your Halloween enjoyment, here’s George Jefferson himself spiriting his way through a disco title track of supernatural proportions.
Trick Or Treat – what more can you possibly give The Shindig? Haven’t you given enough already? Surely there are no more Halloween delights under your thin candy shell.
Oh, but there is – a thick nougat center of Monster Rap awesomeness.
In between all the Fastway rocking of the Trick Or Treat soundtrack, tucked away so’s you might not even notice, is this curve-ball of horrific proportions. From 80’s Hip-Hop maestros Whodini comes one of the finest Monster Raps featured on The Shindig, The Haunted House of Rock.
Played during the Halloween Dance sequence, just before Roger turns the speakers over to Sammy Curr’s backwards metallic cassette, Whodini rocks a rhyme about the monsters and mayhem taking place at the titular haunted abode.
What is this song doing on this soundtrack? What is this song even doing in existence? I don’t have an answer to either question, but in both cases I’m sure glad it is.
Succeeding in just about every way Lovebug Starski’sAmityville fails, The Haunted House of Rock features an actual Haunted House propagated by a multitude of real ghouls with no sign of any Starship Enterprise crew members in sight.
Amityville only outshines it for a brief moment when Dracula raps. That’s pretty huge and should not be ignored. Don’t get me wrong, I love me some Amityville and it’s ridiculously unhaunted tale, but Whodini delivers the goods in way Starski only aspires to and they remain the champs of the Haunted Monster Party Rap game.
The Haunted House of Rock may even be the champ of the Monster Rap game in its entirety. But it does have some stiff competition.
If you Iike your Monster Raps a bit more specific, Are You Ready For Freddy might be your speed. If you like them a bit more ridiculous, then maybe The Maniac Cop Rap is the winner. Or if you like your Monster Rappin a bit more whack, then The Monster Squad is just what the doctor ordered.
But for my money, when it comes to legitimacy, Whodini is holding it down with this old-school hip-hop horror hit and its inclusion in Trick Or Treat just ups the ante.
I saw everybody there, except you. Let’s change that this year.
Return of the Living Dead Part II gets a bad rap. Granted, it’s pretty well deserved, but it gets a bad rap all the same.
Honestly though, in its defense, it had a full count walking to the plate: take one of the most beloved, successful and awesome zombie horror/comedies ever, which wraps itself up pretty fucking tightly and expand on it. Go!
Yeah it strikes out, but that was to be expected. At least it doesn’t get caught looking. It goes down swinging.
It’s never very dark or scary or serious (as the trailer led people to believe) nor is it ever terribly funny. Comedy is tricky and when it face-plants, it does so hard and loudly. It’s not quite as cringe inducing as its equally I’ll-advised contemporary, C.H.U.D. 2, but unlike its counter part you at least feel like your watching an honest to god sequel, despite how shitty that sequel may be.
One thing Return of the Living Dead Part II gets sort of right is the music. While nowhere near the iconic status of its predecessor’s, there’s some good tunes to be had on this soundtrack. Whether it’s Anthrax or Leatherwolf or this turn from Joe Lamont.
Being that this really the only thing the Shindig ultimately concerns itself with, Return of The Living Dead Part II gets its day.
Since our Halloween movie countdown is focusing on Halloween sequels, let’s keep the sequel soundtrack train rolling over here with a tune from an actual Halloween sequel.
If you’re a C.H.U.D. fan, a horror fan or even just a normal person trying to sit down and watch an enjoyable movie, C.H.U.D. II: Bud the C.H.U.D. doesn’t have a whole hell of a lot to offer you.
If you’re Halloween Shindig, a blog centered around a Halloween Playlist which encompasses all types of random nonsensical horror-related music from the movies, suddenly C.H.U.D. II: Bud the C.H.U.D. has something quite fantastic to offer.
And that thing is out next number, by-liner title track Bud The C.H.U.D. from Kipp Lennon.
Who the hell is Kipp Lennon?
That’s a great question. Apparently he’s a founding member of the folk group Venice. Yeah, I’d never heard of them either.
However, it appears he’s also the voice behind mental patient Leon Kompowski who believes he’s Michael Jackson in the Simpsons episode “Stark Raving Dad.” As such, he’s the guy who sings “Happy Birthday Lisa.” That’s pretty weird.
Seems he’s had a handful of gigs impersonating Michael Jackson’s voice. He doesn’t do that here unfortunately, presumably using his natural God-given sound to accentuate all the incredible lyrics Bud the C.H.U.D. has to offer.
Outside of this track, C.H.U.D. IIis a rather harmless, if mildly entertaining tangent to the original C.H.U.D. It also takes place during Halloween and features a pretty great Halloween party sequence (a staple) and some fun trick or treating.
Compared to some of the junk featured on The Return of the 31 Days of Halloween Horror list, you can do a lot worse this season theC.H.U.D. II.
So, if you’re feeling festive and silly, pop it on and you’ll be treated to this fun 80’s tune from Kipp Lennon.
Fred Krueger the myth or Fred Krueger the man? It doesn’t matter cause they’re still rappin’ bout him, understand?
The lesser heralded of the 2 official Freddy rap songs, I feel Are You Ready For Freddyis superior to Nightmare on My Street for several good reasons:
It’s The Fat Boys and they’re cooler than Will Smith any day of the week.
It’s officially from a Freddy movie (Part 4: The Dream Master)
It’s less generic about it’s Freddydom, as multiple Elm Street films are referenced and sampled.
It actually features Robert Englund rapping as Freddy, as opposed to whoever the hell is rapping on the DJ Jazzy Jeff track.
2020 Update to this bullet point!
According to Hip-Hop Historian Werner Von Wallenrod, the Freddy inA Nightmare on My Streetis actually Ready Rock C! So that’s pretty cool.
Additionally, it is Werner’s assessment this is NOT Robert Englund rapping on TheFat Boy’s track. While my instincts tell me this is Englund, due not only to his appearance in the video, but also the almost unmistakable quality of this Freddy voice, Werner has a compelling basis for his assertion.
It seems no pressing of this track actually credits Robert Englund as being a performer. Now, one might be inclined to think Robert would certainly be credited, if not even require being credited, if this was, in fact, him. Case in point: the 1987 album Freddy’s Greatest Hits 100% credits Robert Englund as providing the Freddy voice. In fact, it goes so far as to credit him as “the creator” of that voice. Robert probably has something of this nature dialed right into his contract, no doubt.
That album, being released a full year before Are You Ready for Freddy, sets a pretty clear precedent. The 12″ single for Are You Ready for Freddy and the The Fat Boy’s album, Coming Back Hard, which features the song, both include a special thanks to “Freddy Krueger.” But, that isn’t terribly compelling.
Wikipedia, which also isn’t necessarily compelling on its own, does credit Robert Englund as performing the Freddy voice. However, that article is itself citing a Rolling Stone article on the lawsuit between Jive Records and New Line Cinema regarding A Nightmare on My Street. Again, not super compelling, but that is Rolling Stone, for whatever that’s worth.
I think Werner has a good point, and there doesn’t seem to be much out there to roundly disprove his theory. In my heart, I think I want to believe this is Robert, so I’m clinging to the idea that it is. But the truth is still out there, and you better believe if I ever see Robert Englund again at Monsterpalooza, I’m definitely asking him that shit.
Now back to our regularly scheduled post!
And if that wasn’t enough, lines like
“With a hat like a vagabond
Standin’ like a flasher
It’s Mr. Big Time, Fred Krueger
Dream crasher”
make all the difference in the world.
Freddymania is in full swing here in 1988 and the series has finally degraded into pure schillery. Freddy is a trade-able commodity now, like pork bellies or silver. He starts hitting the talk show circuit, making music video appearances and hanging out in the windshield of cars.
I actually own this, and it’s fucking awesome.
A double-edged sword no doubt, as it’s exactly this kind of boardroom buffoonery that gives us such an awesome track as Are You Ready for Freddy (and my equally awesome sun-shield.)
But in terms of the movie, well viewers paid the price. Freddy’s crackin’ wise, sportin’ sunglasses and eatin’ pizza like some damned Ninja Turtle. Ceasing to be at all frightening and with the cleanest sweater I think he’s ever worn, Freddy’s less your dirty old dream diddler and more your pal. Hell, he’s brought back from his “grave” by the fiery urine of Kincaid’s dog Jason. Yeah, it sets up its jackassery early and securely.
But I enjoy The Dream Master for much the same reason I enjoy Freddy’s Dead: I love Freddy as a character (either scary or silly) and it’s just a ridiculous piece of horror film making.
Plus it has this song.
Which, interestingly enough, has an alternate version. There was a second, longer version of the track cut for the 12″ single. What? Now that’s the kinda shit The Shindig lives for.
So why isn’t that the featured track? Well, to be honest, I don’t like it as much. It’s a bit slower, the beats a little different and there’s a bunch of extra incidental sounds tossed all over it. It’s kinda weird.
Plus, it cuts out Freddy’s original rap at the end! What?! You get an alternate, almost spoken-word outro from The Dream Crasher, which is fun but just isn’t quite the same.
However, it does feature some pretty fantastic extra verses in the middle where The Boys detail the plot from the original Elm Street and talk about Freddy more. And there’s more samples from the original Elm Street thrown in for good measure. Bonus.
Since we all know and have just addressed with whom you’d contact over telephone wires should it become apparent that you in fact have harmful apparitions approaching, let’s task listeners with a similar question:
Yeah, but who do you call when you have Monsters?
That’s right. And at last we come to The Monster Squad. From the very first CD in 2002, The Monster Squad has been a permanent fixture of Halloween Shindig and remains one of my favorite selections on the playlist.
Granted, I may be a bit biased but this song is representing hard. Let’s check the stats:
Is it about a horror movie?
Check, it’s about the goddamn Monster Squad.
Ah, yes, but is it in the movie?
In it? Motherfucker, it’s the Title Track. Triple check that shit.
We talkin’ bout Monsters?
Fuck yeah we are. It’s like a goddamn monster mash up in this motherfucker. Dracula, Frankenstein’s Monster, the Wolfman, the Mummy, the Creature from the Black Lagoon. That’s the big five, son. Throw in some sexy vampire chicks, a grotesque bat transformation and a werewolf exploding out of the sky and you’ve got some real monster shit on lock. Check + to Monster Song.
What more could you ask for? Well, they even mention Halloween too. Sure, it’s to illustrate how this ain’t Halloween (or some phony deal) but we’ll just look that other way on that one. They say Halloween and damn it if that ain’t all that matters sometimes.
Now all of that sounds like a Referentially Inclusive Monster Halloween Title Track to me, gang.
And it’s a Monster Rap to boot? Holy shit, is there anything this song can’t do?
One of the most ridiculous tracks you can imagine, The Monster Squad was suspiciously recorded by some anonymous collective of Hip-Hop Demigods that chose to remain nameless. What?!
Why the hell anyone would elect to do this is so far beyond the scope of my imagination it boarders on madness. If I was responsible for this song I’d put it on every job application I ever filled out.
2 years as an Assistant Hanger Inspector for Sears and Roebuck.
4 months as a Substitute Wigsmith at The Downtown Clownery.
Oh yeah and I wrote the motherfucking Monster Squad Rap. What’s up?
From a time when everyone thought something like this was a really great idea, The Monster Squad (for anyone thinking otherwise) is a really great idea.
It’s is pretty whack? Yeah, I guess so. If you wanna be a jerk about it.
Is it poorly conceived and equally executed? Yeah, I suppose I’d have to concede that fact too, if you really want this to be a frank discussion about musical integrity.
But fuck that discussion and fuck you for wanting it pal, cause this song fucking rules. It’s a rap song about a group of kids fighting The Universal Monsters. Oh, did you not catch that? It’s a rap song about a group of kids fighting The Universal Monsters. Whomever is responsible for this song should be a cultural icon. They should have a fucking Grammy and an Academy Award.
Instead, (I’ve Had) The Time of My Life from Dirty Dancing took the honor that year. All right, fair enough. Maybe that’s a better song, but it lacks the lyric:
“We don’t wanna hang with the walking dead, so we gotta kick some monster butt instead.”
What’s up now, Academy of Arts and Sciences?
Looking into this travesty further, I discovered the competition that year was actually pretty stiff. Check this shit out:
“Storybook Love” by Willy DeVille and Mark Knopfler from The Princess Bride
Damn, that’s a solid 80’s line-up right there. Maybe I spoke too soon. Still, it should have been nominated at the absolute least. Who the hell is still talking about Cry Freedom 26 years later?
No one, that’s who.
But I digress.
An interesting side note to this song: the original version I had on the 2002 CD was pulled from my old VHS copy of Monster Squad. Incidentally, this was later signed by Tom “The Gillman” Woodruff Jr. Coincidence? I like to think not.
This version of the song contained the line:
“First came Dracula, now the Wolfman too, The Mummy and the Gillman swimming in the pool.”
What? Why did that roll call just fall the fuck apart?
Hear that sample below:
I always thought this was a pretty strange and horrendous line, particularly when they could have just as simply said “and the Creature from the Black Lagoon.”
But I guess they couldn’t say “and the Creature from the Black Lagoon,” for the home video release. Damn copyrights.
All things considered, that’s not a bad save. Syllabically sound, it even sort of rhymes, at least no more or less than the original false rhyme. But damn is it silly. Who the fuck is the Gillman? Why are they calling The Creature from the Black Lagoon “The Gillman?” And why is he in the pool? Did I miss a scene where he climbs out of a pool? Why did he just say that?
Upon upgrading the tune for better quality many years later when The Monster Squad finally saw a DVD release, I noticed the line was suddenly changed to “and the Creature From The Black Lagoon” and I thought “Shit, that must have been the original lyric. How about that.” Now, I just feel sort of nostalgic for the old, butchered scab.
But I’ve spoken too verbosely about all of this as is, so let’s just make with the goods, huh?
One of my favorite songs on the playlist from one of my favorite movies of all time. Here it is….The Monster Squad.
Is there a more well known or loved Title Track than Ray Parker Jr.’sGhostbusters? Probably not. Which explains why you’re guaranteed to hear it multiple times around Halloween and The Shindig is obviously no exception.
A certified hit, Ghostbusters spent 3 weeks at #1 on the Billboard charts in August of 1984 and it’s no wonder. This catchy number is spooky, danceable and unrelentingly 80’s.
And the video, one of the first cross-media promotional blitzes of its kind, is something to behold. With Ray creeping it up in a weird, minimalistic, neon house, The Ghostbusters themselves dancing down Broadway with him and a collection of the most bizarre cameos ever assembled, it’s pure Reagen-Era cheese.
Seriously, what the fuck is Peter Falk doing in the Ghostbusters video? Chevy Chase, John Candy, Al Franken, hell even Danny Devito all make some sort of sense. But then up pops Columbo and what the fuck? Yeah, it’s pretty 80’s.
The song itself wasn’t something Ray Parker’s people were at all interested in having Ray sing. Keep in mind, the movie wasn’t even released yet, much less a success.
“So wait, you want our smooth, panty droppin’ Ray Parker Jr. to sing about fuckin’ ghosts for,…what’s this fuckin’ thing called again? ‘Ghostbusters?’ Yeah, that ain’t happening, pal. You can take a hike with that business.”
It’s an understandable reaction. But Ivan Reitman managed to convinced old Ray it’d be a hit and damn it if the guy wasn’t right on the money. The popularity of the movie and this song are completely unmatched.
Now, indelibly woven into the fabric of American pop culture, I’m not sure anyone can ever utter a phrase even close to “who you gonna call?” without some dickhead shouting “Ghostbusters!”
Yeah, that same phrase everyone probably thought sounded pretty stupid before the film blew up like 2 tons of marshmallow all over 1984.
But when something’s this big, people start to pay attention. Maybe a little too closely.
First and foremost you have Huey Lewis suing Ray Parker because he reckoned Ghostbusters sounded a bit too much like I Want a New Drug for his liking. A settlement was reached that Ray still isn’t at liberty discuss on record.
Then you have The Screen Actors Guild getting all bent outta shape due to these cameos and the non-unionized status of the fledgling music video industry.
There’s also a copyright issue regarding the video which has kept it off every subsequent home release of the film, nearly causing the video to be lost forever. Chalk another one up in the win column of the Internet for that.
And still further, there’s even more nonsense over the title with subsequent animated versions of The Ghosbusters, but we’ll delve into that one a little further down the playlist.
For now, let us and your guests revel in what is perhaps the most popular and crowd pleasing song The Shindig has to offer.
The Ramones (b) + Horror Title Track (htt) = Shinding Gold (sg).
And I don’t care what hardcore Ramones fans thought or what The Golden Raspberry Committee had to say on the matter, my equation is airtight.
And just like any good equation you could substitute a lot of bands for that b variable and still get the same value or greater.
Dokken? Check.
45 Grave? Check Plus.
J Geils Band? Double Plus Good.
It’s math. It just works. Numbers don’t lie. And when Joey, Dee Dee, Johnny and Marky set their sights on Stephen King, the result was a horror hit for the ages. Haters be damned!
Stephen King likes to name drop songs in his novels, particularly Ramones songs and Pet Sematary is no different, as Blitzkreg Bop plays heavily into the story.
I believe the story goes that the boys were approached by the producers for the inclusion of Sheena Is A Punk Rocker in the movie. Such fans of the novel were they that The Ramones simply offered to cut an original track just for the film. And not only that, but a Title Track to boot. Don’t know where I heard that, can’t confirm it but it’s in my head and why would I just make that up? Gotta be at least a partly true, right?
It’s one of the greatest Horror Title Tracks of all time performed by one of the greatest Rock ‘N Roll bands ever. The simplicity and raw power of The Ramones lends itself to perhaps the most cartoonishly straight forward song to ever accompany a horror film, or maybe any film for that matter. Though, there is Hard Ticket To Hawaii and The Stabilizer and thems some ridiculous ass Title Tracks.
So blow a raspberry at those Golden Raspberry farts and follow Victor to the sacred place.
So what do hot rods, racing, surfing and zombies all have in common?
Beats the hell outta me but they all come together in one helluva hammer droppin’, high-rev haulin’, outta sight asphalt eater from Ohio creepsters and Shindig All-Stars The Cramps.
Perhaps their most gracious addition to horror-rockdom, The Surfin’ Dead is prominently featured in Dan O’Bannon’s awesome 80’s zombie send-up The Return of The Living Dead.
While no slouch in the soundtrack department, I have to admit this is easily my favorite track off the album, no question. But I love me some Cramps so maybe I’m just a tad bit biased. Or maybe it’s just a great song.
Either way, it belongs on a Halloween playlist. Even a short one.
And just for good measure, Lux tosses in 2 shout outs to Cleveland’s pride and Cramps hoedad, Ghoulardi.
Cause your A-bone’s busted and you’re through the door, so do the dead
Great Pumpkins are few and far between, so to stick two so close together is indicative of the kind of block where in here toward the center of our hallowed playlist.
At last count there were four total; two tried and true Halloween Pumpkins, one Monster Song Pumpkin and another by way of Devilish Track. That’s the bases covered, doubly so in that The Monster Squad is also a Monster Rap.
This one though, this one is the gold standard. This is the one which inspired the category. This is the one by which all the others are measured, and even they fall short of the Shindiggery on display here. If the playlist had its own theme, it would probably be this song.
It’s not necessarily may favorite song on the Shindig (though it would definitely be up there), nor do I mean to suggest it is the best, but it’s so exemplary of what this playlist is all about that it beggars belief. Horror Movies, the music from them, the referential Rock ‘N Roll about them and of course Halloween, all succinctly served in a 4 minute sonic stew.
Is it any surprise that such a song should come from 45 Grave? Not to this guy it doesn’t, and when I first heard it back in 2010 my jaw dropped and I immediately shouted “Holy shit does this song need to be on the playlist.”
But because nothing could be that perfect, naturally, there’s a catch. In this case (and it’s perhaps a bit of my own prejudice rising to the surface) it is the caveat that the song is that comes from the the Night of the Demonsremake. Which is a solid soundtrack, to be sure, but a terrible remake. Moreover, it was a terrible movie in its own right. However, as a remake to one of my favorite Halloween movies of all time, it’s even worse.
So, to balance out that factor, I’ve book-ended it with samples from the original, because, how could I not? This song could have been on the original soundtrack. It should have been on the original soundtrack . So let’s just pretend it was.
And with that, 45 Grave and I invite you to drink, get stoned and party all night, for the demons come alive on Halloween.
What can be said of this classic and perfectly executed Title Track?
If you’ve ever seen Killer Klowns From Outer Spacethen you know first hand how nicely this clown-car 80’s tune from The Dickies bookends this awesome creature feature of camp from monster mavens The Chiodo Brothers.
Cheesy, gory, funny and at times even downright creepy (using a dead sheriff as a ventriloquist’s dummy or the sight of a Klown summoning a small girl from a burger joint come to mind) Killer Klowns was a movie I couldn’t get enough of in my youth. It frightened me, amazed me, made me laugh and held my full, undivided attention every time HBO decided to play it.
The Klowns are a marvel of animatronic suit work, the story is bonkers, and the music has got the tone to match. No Halloween playlist should be lacking Killer Klowns from Outer Space by The Dickies.
Vampire Hookers; honestly I could have used a little more nudity.
Nathan “Unpainted” Arizona and I guy I thought was Michael Rooker for the about the first 20 minutes play a pair of bumbling greenhorn sailors on shore leave in the Philippines. At the local cemetery, they run afoul the pimp-hatted head vampire John Carradine and his titular hoes. Late 70’s porn music and goofball shenanigans ensue.
They’re trying, I’ll give ’em that.
It’s filled to the brim with silly slapstick and toilet humor that’ll probably set both of your eyes on a pivot, but it’s rarely boring, and at 78 minutes it feels pretty brisk and good natured.
Poor John Carradine though stumbles around waiting for a check, spouting Shakespeare and poetry, which could either be interesting or irritating depending on your temperament.
There’s also a fat Filipino familiar who farts a lot for comedic effect. Whether you laugh at his flatulence will also depend on your temperament.
Seen also is a ladyboy pissing at a urinal, which apparently doesn’t tip off old Nathan Arizona, who proceeds to engage in a sexual transaction. Later Michael Rooker yells “Oh God! Balls!” which is always funny to hear someone shout after grabbing a lady’s crotch.
A few silly fistfights later and where onto the cemetery and our plot.
Though severely deficient in the generalized sleaziness and nudity you’d expect for a film called Vampire Hookers, you’re eventually treated to a 7 minute slow-mo vampire 4-way between Michael Rooker and the 3 sex-starved immortals. Thankfully, John Carradine bows out of that one, but the fat familiar watches and farts a bit. Probably jerks off too, couldn’t really tell and thank god for cinematic ambiguity. It’s pretty awesome though, complete with its numerous and repetitious cutaways to the lascivious murals painted around the room of beasts and Devils fornicating. Who’s turn is it?
And that’s not even the best part of the movie.
That would be our next Shindigger at #105, the Title Track Vampire Hookers, played to rousing appreciation during the picture credits at the end of the films. I love picture credits! And Title Tracks! And hookers! What an ending. If only we knew who the hell was performing this tune.
It’s a Shindig first; an Unknown Artist! I searched endlessly to no avail, as I could not track down the culprits. If anyone happens to know who performed this tune, we’ll gladly update the entry.
“Blood is not all they suck,” informs our unnamed composer. The Skinemax orgy sequence tells a different tale, I’m afraid. However, I think it’s safe to assume some sucking has taken place regardless, one way or the other.
While never terribly funny, it is somewhat fun, particularly in a group setting and there’s plenty of worse ways to spend 78 minutes. Plus, those will typically end up sucking an extra 20 minutes from your life and still not have the goddamn common decency to give you the reach around of an awesome Title Track.
So, as far as The Shindig is concerned, Vampire Hookers, you’re all right. As Lord Summerilse might say “you will sit with the Saints, among the elect,” here in our Title Track-heavy center block.
