Monster Talk: Rock ‘N Roll Horror

I mentioned Rock ‘N Roll Horror in my post about John Fasano, and all this Rock ‘N Roll Nightmare/ Black Roses business has got it on my mind. Let’s talk for a moment about this as both a concept and a genre.

Rock ‘N Roll Horror forms the very foundation of Halloween Shindig; it is its ethos. Wherever a monster is dancing, you will find us. Whenever a ghoul grabs a gitbox, we are there. Should The Cryptkeeper or Elvira decide to rap, Halloween Shindig is lying in wait, ready to post that song.

As a genre though, Rock ‘N Roll Horror (or Metalsplotation as you will sometimes find it referred to) leaves us wanting. It has a few things going against it.

Firstly, there just aren’t that many. It’s a pretty thin sub-genre. 22 titles, by my count. You could stretch that number to 30+ if you got real liberal with your criteria and included some misfires from the late 90’s of new millennium. But I’m calling 22.

Additionally, it’s a dead genre. It had its time and place, but its moment in the moonlight has passed. The world has moved on.

I’d say “I wish they still made ’em like this,” but I don’t. That ship has sailed. You try your hand at this game post millennium and you’ll wind up with a Queen of The Damned, or a Rock ‘N Roll Frankenstein. Naw, just leave it where it was. Let it rest in peace; a product of a decade that is gone.

On top of all that (and perhaps worst of all) it’s a pretty terrible sub-genre, and this breaks my shockem_guitardemonheart. Always eager for more of the bread and butter that bloats this blog, I’ve sat through most of them, waiting with bated breath for the next awesome addition to the playlist. I’m usually disappointed. There’s a couple hold-outs of which I’ve yet to find copies, so there’s still a little hope.

Of the 22 Rock ‘N Roll Horror films listed here, most of em aren’t worth a damn. They are time wasters of the highest order; not good enough to laud, not lousy enough to love. Somewhere in between they rest, trapped in a celluloid limbo of missed opportunities and boredom. It’s a genre after my own heart, and it consistently breaks it.

Maybe it’s my fault. Maybe I got too much expectation. Or maybe Trick Or Treat is just that damn good. Probably a combination.

Here’s a list of the most prominent offenders; the ones you’ll see listed elsewhere if you dig hard enough.

  1. Terror On Tour 1980
  2. New Years Evil 1980
  3. Shock: Diversão Diabólica 1984
  4. Rocktober Blood 1984
  5. Blöderan 1984
  6. Monster Dog 1984
  7. Blood Tracks 1985
  8. Trick Or Treat 1986
  9. Edge of Hell / Rock ‘N Roll Nightmare 1987
  10. Slumber Party Massacre 2 1987
  11. Slaughterhouse Rock 1988
  12. Hack-O-Lantern 1988
  13. Hard Rock Zombies 1988
  14. Lone Wolf 1988
  15. Black Roses 1988
  16. Hard Rock Nightmare 1988
  17. Scream Dream 1989
  18. Houseboat Horror 1989
  19. Paganini Horror 1989
  20. Rockula 1990
  21. Dead Girls 1990
  22. Shock Em Dead 1991

True, this list excludes overtly music themed horror outings such as The Rocky Horror Picture Show, Attack of the Killer Tomatoes or Little Shop Of Horrors, but for me, those fall into the altogether separate category of the Horror Musical.

Naw, these are Rock ‘N Roll Horror movies. Movies where rocking has precedence. Movies where a rock band or singer takes the main stage and blows your doors off.

The Phantom of the Paradise tows a fine line, and could very well be considered a Rock ‘N Roll Horror, but its too much of a Rock Opera to be smashed in with these kinds of films I think. Heavy Metal Massacre is also excluded because there’s too much of David DeFalco’s hair and apartment and too little metaling, despite it’s title.

The most depressing aspect of it all, even more than the lack of entertainment factor, is that not  every one of these 22 films has made the cut for The Shindig. Some of them have music that’s just that wildly out of place, or just that bad. And The Shindig has some pretty terrible music on it, so that oughta give you an idea of what you’re up against.

I’ll talk about all of these films by degrees over time. But for now, lets take a few of these suckers that did make the cut, and lay out a full-on Rock ‘N Roll Horror block here in the late ’90’s, before busting headlong into one of my favorite stretches of the entire Shindig, just in time for Halloween.

Audio

We Live To Rock

TRACK #94:

We Live To Rock by Thor and The Tritonz

The best song (and maybe even scene) from The Edge of Hell is also perhaps Thor’s greatest song altogether, We Live To Rock.

Perfectly summarizing Thor’s rock-philosophy in a 4 word chorus, We Live To Rock is a metal anthem for the ages.

It hails from a time in metal when the greatest source of inspiration was one’s own devotion to, and level of – rocking. These were the good ole days; the days when all you had to do was talk about how much you rocked, the manner in which you rocked and that you fully intended to continue rocking, to make a great song.

And a great song it is.

The end sample is from John Cody Fasano’s Thor: The Rock Opera. Taking place after the events of Edge of Hell’s sequel The Intercessor, the final installment in the Rock ‘N Roll Nightmare Trilogy finds Thor battling the evil snake god Jörmungandr and his evil karaoke henchman Metallus.

Standby for a GIF-rally from John Cody’s Rock Opera, starring my good pal Matt Mastrella.

Until then, let them know…

 

Audio

Me Against The World

TRACK #93:

Me Against The World by Lizzy Borden

Heavy Metal contains a demonic power. It seems a sinister and subversive force seeking to set upon our children and corrupt them against ourselves, our values, our religions and our very way of life.

In John Fasano’s Black Roses, the titular band takes this idea to its natural and literal end. They are demons in disguise; corrupting and possessing the children of Millbasin in an all-out-war of the night against the adults. They become the black roses, soldiers of the night, and slowly begin killing their parents.

Listen Bro, I don’t care how cool your Powerslave shirt is, you touch my Black Roses LP and you’re getting laid the fuck out.

Fasano’s second roll ‘n rock horror odyssey plays almost like antithetical companion piece to Edge of Hell. Where Thor’s metal works as a power of light to defeat the Devil, The Black Roses show us it can also have the power conspire with the old scratch and do his bidding.

Viewed as such, they make a nice double feature. Black Roses, however (for better or worse) is a much more polished work. In not serving as a vehicle for Jon-Mikl Thor’s ego and equally large wardrobe, the whole thing feels less like a glorified music video and more like a genuine film.

There’s definite production value increases; a larger cast, a more involved plot, multiple locations, a pretty legit looking concert opener, and an overall improvement on a special effects level.

I say for better or worse because all of this may or may not increase your enjoyment of Black Roses over Edge of Hell. Gone is Thor’s over the top muscle-metal machismo. Gone are the truly silly effects. Gone is that absolutely ridiculous b-movie sensibility.

Now, if that’s the sort of thing you hate about Edge of Hell, then perhaps Black Roses will prove more enjoyable for you. However, if those are the very reasons you absolutely love it, then Black Roses will probably feel like a bit of a let down.

In other words, Black Roses in a much better film in the classical sense. However, if you’re the kind of viewer that likes their movies with a little extra cheese, Edge of Hell’s got it beat by a furlong.

Black Roses has plenty of its own goodness to match that of its predecessor, however:

  • More breasts minus Thor’s ass. Check Plus.
  • Better FX.
  • Better, non-musician based acting.
  • A more identifiable plot.
  • John Martin straight handling she-demons like he was John Macenroe.
  • An equal (albeit less awesome) amount of rocking.
  • A glimpse at what might have been if Tom Selleck played Marty McFly.
  • Some really kick-ass demons playing some serious hair metal to set the whole thing off.
  • And above all, a great soundtrack.

This opening sequence is really what The Shindig is all about, though.

It kinda makes you wish the whole movie was nothing but this, and wonder just what the hell happened when The Black Roses finally reveal their true selves again during the film’s climax.

Who the hell are these dudes? Where’d those other demons go, from the begininning? It’s anyone’s guess. I’ll have to ask John Cody. I imagine they just ran outta money. Or shot the ending first, and then found more money after.

Oh well. Least we get some kick-ass gifs.

From that killer opening sequence, here’s Lizzy Borden playing Me Against The World, under (ironically) the guise of the demonic Black Roses.

Oh, man. This is heavy, Doc.

 

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Tenement is a Place to Live!

Here’s the awesome VHS 1 sheet poster for Roberta Findlay’s Tenement (aka Game of Survival) painted by John Fasano himself.

Give Tenement a go to get your next fix of sleazy 80’s punk vs. vigilante apartment dwellers action.

Plus it’s got that awesome Title Track from The Kool Krew!

“Tenement is a place to live!”

Audio

Wild Life

TRACK #92:

Wild Life by Thor and The Tritonz

The Edge of Hell; a movie so badass it finds its main character (legendary rocker Jon-Mikl Thor) tricking the Devil himself.

Essentially, Jon and his band of cliched rock ‘n roll cut-outs named The Trintonz, take up lodging in a old barn to cut a new record. Only problem is Beelzebub and his minions have already taken up residence, and slowly begin possessing the band.

The real problem is, all these cliched characters are just that, characters Jon pulled from horror movies to entertain the Devil’s minions. “Shadows” he tells the Devil, fresh souls to lure the Devil out of hiding.

And it worked.

See, Jon is the Intercessor, the Archangel Triton, set to do battle with the Devil whenever he crosses over into the world of the living. And boy does he ever battle.

After dodging some star fish and grappling with the beast for about 10 minutes, Jon trips the Devil, forcing the old scratch to concede. The day is won.

But we’re the real winners, when Thor and The Tritonz rock out, as they are wont to do throughout the film.

Though the soundtrack is composed entirely of Thor songs, we’ve taken 2 of the best tracks and featured them back-to-back for your enjoyment.

First up is the first cut from the film. A track which, under any normal circumstance would be the title track. However, it’s not. It’s just called Wild Life, which is weird, because if it weren’t for Thor simply shouting “Wild Life” repeatedly during the last 30 seconds, the phrase “The Edge of Hell” would appear more times the the title of the damn song.

So, what’s the deal then? Is it a Title Track?

Naw, not officially. Which is kinda lame, ‘cause we really want it to be, and it kinda almost is.

So, we’ll file it under the category anyway for fun, with the hashtag addendum that it’s not really a title track.

 

Monster Makers: John Fasano

On July 19th of 2014, writer, director, producer, actor, artist, monster maker and all-around nice guy John Fasano, passed away in his home near Los Angeles California.

John was a purveyor of that which molds the very foundations of the Shindig; rock ‘n roll horror. The man behind such 80’s cult staples as Zombie Nightmare, Black Roses and The Edge of Hell (aka Rock N Roll Nightmare), John understood exactly why metal and horror went together so well, and added much to this unfortunately thin sub-genre.

Having been a fan of his work, it was surreal to meet and become friends with his son, John Cody, through my network of special effectsery out here in LA.

Though I only met him a few times, on those occasions John was the nicest guy you could imagine, and truly gracious for every fan he had.

Our condolences go out to John Cody and the entire Fasano family.

Without a doubt John left his mark on the world of Horror, and horror fans will continue to celebrate his work for as long as there are horror fans to do so.

For our part, The Shindig will honor John the only way it knows how; through kick-ass horror songs and gifs. We’ll cram all the Fasano hits already spread throughout the playlist into one blistering block of rock ‘n roll remembrance.

Thank you John Fasano for your work, without which, my life and this blog would be a lot less awesome.

R.I.P. John Fasano 1961 – 2014

Audio

Dead Man’s Party

TRACK #91:

Dead Man’s Party by Oingo Boingo

Well, it wouldn’t be much of a dead man’s party without Dead Man’s Party, now would it?

A classic and obligatory party playlist inclusion, no Halloween would be complete without at least one go-round to Oingo Boingo’s certified horrified hit.

No frills, no samples, no nothing. Just Dead Man’s Party.

Enjoy!